Updated: July 15, 2021
Originally Published: March 19, 2015
As a parent, you’ve likely compiled a list of people who drive you up the wall, and at the very top are the following characters who seem to harbor a deep-seated disdain for parents.
- Toy Packaging Designers: Is there an official title for these people, or do they just consult with the underworld for their ideas? You peel away layers of plastic, untie countless little ropes, and even risk injury with scissors, only to discover that you need a screwdriver to free the final piece, which seems utterly pointless. All the while, your child is throwing a tantrum that only the toy can soothe…and then you realize it requires batteries.
- Checkout Aisle Merchandisers: Let me tell you, you’ve never witnessed a toddler’s obsession with impulse buys until you’re stuck in a checkout line. As you prepare to pay, suddenly your cart is filled with $47 worth of lip balms and magazines about Kim Kardashian and Elvis sightings. Those strategically placed gift cards are practically begging to be grabbed by little hands. They should really consider adding wine dispensers to those aisles for parents’ sanity!
- Fast Food Play Area Planners: You think you’re treating the family to a quick meal, and these establishments cater to families with kid-friendly meals and toys. But then, out of nowhere, you see a massive, brightly-colored jungle gym that ignites your children’s desires for playtime. How much of the phrase “If you finish your nuggets, you can go play!” do you think a 3-year-old absorbs? Exactly zero.
- Balloon Manufacturers: We all appreciate a festive balloon arrangement for a child’s birthday, but what do kids always want afterward? The balloons! These manufacturers create floating hazards that require constant retrieval from ceilings and pose a choking risk. And if you step outside? Prepare for the wails when that buoyant joy escapes into the sky, leaving you with a very upset child.
- Children’s Music CD Producers: Who genuinely looks forward to a three-hour road trip filled with a two-song sing-along? It doesn’t matter how many tracks are on the CD; kids will insist on playing “Wheels on the Bus” and “Old MacDonald” on repeat. What’s that? The driver gets to choose the music? Not in this minivan of broken dreams!
There are undoubtedly more culprits out there, lurking and devising new ways to push parents to the edge. If you’re interested in learning more about parenting, check out this informative link to artificial insemination for insights on family building. For more parenting tips, visit Home Insemination Kit or consider the CryoBaby Home Intracervical Insemination Syringe Kit for your journey.
In summary, navigating parenthood can be a challenge, especially when faced with certain individuals and products that seem to conspire against you. From toy packaging to the chaos of checkout aisles, being a parent often feels like an uphill battle against the odds.