Updated: Oct. 1, 2023
It’s a bright Saturday morning at 7:47 a.m., and I’m rushing to secure a spot in my beloved 8 a.m. step class. The usual attendees are mostly women ranging from their late 30s to early 50s. Yet today, I find myself walking in behind two young, new moms. Here’s what I overhear:
“You look fantastic! You’re so slim,” says Mom #1 to Mom #2, who is cradling a cute little baby under a year old.
Mom #2 frowns slightly. “Oh, no. I’m still a few pounds above what I was before Ethan.”
I take a moment to examine her—without a doubt, she’s thin. As a mom of three who has always prioritized fitness, I feel I have a good grasp of body shapes and sizes.
“Yeah, I totally understand,” replies Mom #1. “I still can’t run as far as I did pre-baby with Mia, and keeping the weight off is a struggle. But I’m not ready to give up my wine.”
Cheers to that! Don’t sacrifice the wine! Meanwhile, I can’t help but notice that she’s even slimmer than her friend.
I get it. Once the initial shock of bringing home a new baby wears off and you’ve adjusted to motherhood, your focus shifts to “regaining your body.” Despite knowing that life has changed forever, we still hold onto the expectation that our bodies should bounce back.
As I watch the women head toward childcare, I want to share these thoughts:
1. Your body will never look the same.
The reality is that your body has undergone irreversible changes. Even if you manage to reach your pre-baby weight, those pounds will settle differently. The landscape of your body has transformed—some areas may sag, while others may have filled out. For me, it’s the way my rear feels in a swimsuit, the loose skin around my knees from carrying three babies, and the altered state of my belly button. Yet, there are also beautiful changes: the curve of my hips has become more pronounced, my cheekbones stand out more, and my hair has never been so vibrant.
2. Your body’s functionality will shift.
Not only does your appearance change, but so does your physical ability. Running five miles without discomfort is likely a thing of the past for me. A perfectly flat stomach may be a distant memory, regardless of how many exercises I try. Jumping jacks? Let’s just say I can’t do those without a little mishap. Two and a half years after my third child arrived, I’m still figuring out what my body can handle and what it can’t.
3. Your body will surprise you with its strength.
While your body may not work the way it used to, it will amaze you with its capabilities. You’ll find yourself waking up multiple times at night to soothe a crying baby, and you’ll be able to hold your little one for hours without tiring. Your biceps may become defined from those endless cuddles. You may discover just how fast you can run when your toddler makes a break for it toward the street. Embrace the surprising strength of your new mama body!
4. Find beauty in unexpected places.
Conversations about post-pregnancy beauty are everywhere, and while it’s normal to notice changes like sagging skin or stretch marks, it doesn’t mean we should view ourselves as unattractive. Our culture often makes it difficult to appreciate our new bodies, but the key is to shift your perspective. It’s not just our bodies that have transformed; our outlook on life has changed as well. Beauty can be found in the smallest details, from your baby’s long eyelashes while they sleep to the proud moments when you call their diaper “beautiful.” Your unique features, like the lines around your eyes from laughter or sleepless nights, only add depth to your story.
These are the realities of my post-baby body. I still grapple with accepting the changes and sometimes feel envious of celebrity moms who have access to trainers and meal plans. I’m not thrilled about my post-baby bladder, my aching back, or the fact that Spanx have become a staple in my wardrobe.
However, dwelling on the past won’t do any good, so I choose to celebrate my mama body as it is and, of course, never give up the wine. For more insights on home insemination and pregnancy, check out this resource from News Medical and learn more about the process on Make a Mom.
Summary:
Embracing the post-baby body is a journey filled with surprises, challenges, and newfound strengths. It’s crucial to acknowledge that while our appearances and physical capabilities may change, we can also discover beauty in unexpected places. By shifting our focus to the amazing things our bodies can do, we can foster a positive body image and continue to celebrate the joys of motherhood.