Parenting
Updated: Sep. 21, 2023
Originally Published: April 10, 2015
In the realm of parenting, opinions often clash, especially when it comes to raising children. Topics such as dietary choices, disciplinary methods, and educational paths can lead to starkly different camps of parents who are passionate about their approaches. Bedtime routines for kids are no exception.
From what I’ve witnessed, parents generally fall into two categories: 1.) Those who enforce an early bedtime with strict adherence, and 2.) Those who allow their children to stay up late with a more relaxed attitude about when they hit the pillow.
Guess which category I belong to? I’ll admit it; I’m firmly in the control freak camp when it comes to my children’s sleep.
Last summer, a friend invited us to a fireworks display for the Fourth of July. Fireworks? Don’t they usually happen after dark? That would mean they wouldn’t start until at least 9:30 p.m. My kids would have already been fast asleep for two hours by then! In our household, bedtime is a strict 7:30 p.m. And thanks to Daylight Savings Time, they’re often tucked in before the sun goes down for half the year.
In the early months of my daughters’ lives, I made it a priority to establish a schedule that included an early bedtime. Our family subscribes to the “early to bed, early to rise” philosophy. No matter when my kids go to sleep, I can always count on my two-year-old to wake me up with her rendition of “If You’re Happy and You Know It,” accompanied by her enthusiastic foot stomps against the wall. Adorable? Absolutely! But oh-so-early in the morning. Until they are old enough to turn on the morning cartoons themselves, I’m dragged out of bed too. So, while I’ve never been a night owl, having young children reinforces my early bedtime routine.
Toddlers and infants simply don’t grasp the concept of bedtime. They’re oblivious to the kids still playing outside, the evening TV shows yet to air, or the special events we often decline. So, my philosophy is simple: What they don’t know won’t hurt them. When my kids get a full night’s sleep, they’re happy. And when they’re happy, I’m happy. Sleep equals happiness in my home, so I gladly prioritize their rest over a busy social life.
I often find myself intrigued, yet non-judgmental, towards parents whose kids stay up much later than mine. “I can’t believe he stayed up to watch the ball drop!” I exclaimed to my best friend about her 4-year-old. “I love keeping the kids up for special reasons,” she enthused. Since she’s a close friend, I can tease her lightly, saying, “You’re a little ‘crazy,’” and she’ll laugh in agreement. It’s a shared understanding that our views on this topic differ.
However, I sometimes forget that not every family operates the same way mine does. There are kids who are wide awake until 9 p.m., 10 p.m., or even later! While that schedule may work for some, it certainly doesn’t suit my family. I also remind myself that other parents might react with disbelief to my kids’ bedtime: “Your kids are in bed by 7:30!?” And that’s perfectly fine.
Perhaps kids like my friends’ are the ones who sleep in later in the morning. Even if they miss a bit of sleep one night, they might still manage to be pleasant the next day. That approach doesn’t work for my daughters, however.
Truth be told, I appreciate my kids’ early bedtime. The time between their lights out and mine, though brief, allows my husband and me to reconnect without a toddler’s clingy antics or a crying baby demanding attention.
Will they maintain this early bedtime forever? Of course not. There will be special occasions that push back bedtime, albeit rarely. So while I foresee many more early nights in our future, I know they will eventually get to experience life beyond 7:30 p.m. Who knows? Maybe they’ll even catch some fireworks one day.
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Summary
In the world of parenting, opinions on bedtime routines can vary widely. As a parent who values an early bedtime, I prioritize my children’s sleep to ensure they’re happy and well-rested. While some families operate differently, I’ve found that our early routine benefits everyone, allowing for family connection time and a happier household overall.