What roles do women typically embrace? A significant number of them are mothers. Indeed, motherhood is often touted as one of the most vital roles a woman can take on. Yet, women are capable of so much more—there are countless other important roles they can fulfill.
Consider a hypothetical scenario where a lesson on President’s Day began like this: “What did Abraham Lincoln do? He was a father!” While being a dad is undoubtedly a significant responsibility, Lincoln is also renowned for abolishing slavery and leading the nation through the Civil War. Men, like women, are multi-faceted individuals capable of various achievements.
Curiously, we seldom refer to a man’s role as a parent when discussing their accomplishments. The conversation rarely includes phrases that suggest men can “almost” do anything. However, when we discuss notable women, motherhood is often presented as their defining characteristic—even to young audiences.
Interestingly, the majority of the historical women my child learned about recently—like Amelia Earhart, Clara Barton, and Susan B. Anthony—were not mothers. Sacagawea was the only exception, known for her journey with a young child during a significant time in her life. While I might grumble about the chaos of daily life with my kids, Sacagawea’s journey with an infant showcases a stark contrast in our experiences.
It seems the curriculum chose to emphasize motherhood as the “most important job” perhaps to appease stay-at-home mothers or to remind working mothers of their priorities. When comparing Harriet Tubman’s monumental accomplishments to the tasks I handle, like packing lunches, it raises questions about societal values.
In today’s world, many stay-at-home moms feel slighted by the notion that working moms are somehow more significant, while working moms may feel belittled by the constant reminder that motherhood overshadows their careers. Such discussions can be contentious in adult circles, but when framed for children, they can create misguided perceptions.
Our children—both sons and daughters—should not be taught that motherhood is the sole measure of a woman’s worth. When we label motherhood as a “job,” we send a message that it is the primary standard by which to evaluate women’s lives. But the truth is, motherhood isn’t a job. It’s an experience that doesn’t come with a paycheck or a path to resignation. Sure, it demands hard work and can feel like a job at times, but it fundamentally differs in nature.
My son often talks about his future as a father, expressing whimsical ideas like letting his kids wear shorts in winter. He imagines being a parent without attaching it to any particular career aspirations, like becoming a professional athlete. No one has confused the two roles in his mind.
Perhaps it’s time for us—curriculum designers, social media users, and mothers—to reconsider how we frame these discussions.
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In summary, it’s crucial to redefine motherhood as a unique experience rather than a mere job. Doing so helps foster a more comprehensive understanding of women’s roles that extends beyond parental duties.