Forget the obsession with being “rockstar skinny.” The latest trend in male physiques is the dadbod. You might have a good idea of what this looks like. According to New York magazine, the dadbod is “a physique characterized by undefined muscles beneath a light layer of flab, usually featuring a beer belly.”
Essentially, the dadbod strikes a balance—it’s not overly fat, but it’s certainly not thin either. There are muscles lurking beneath the surface, but they prefer to stay low-key, avoiding any need for showiness. Picture Michelangelo’s David, but with an extra hundred pounds of marble around the midsection, thighs, and chest. The dadbod doesn’t adhere to a strict aesthetic; instead, it conveys a clear message: I’m relaxed, I enjoy indulging in a hearty pizza—like half a pie, not just a slice—and I wash it down with a robust IPA.
This body type is an inviting space for others—ideal for those who prioritize comfort over conventional attractiveness.
As you might have guessed, I’m talking about my own dadbod here! I wholeheartedly embrace this trend—not just because it reflects my current physique, but also due to the surprisingly accurate commentary surrounding it. Emily Shornick, a photo editor from New York, humorously noted, “What’s great about dadbod sex is that you know you’re gonna have great postcoital snacks,” while jokingly predicting that dadbods are bound to have cheese in their fridges.
The first to champion the dadbod was sophomore Lily Harper, writing for The Odyssey. She claimed that dadbods give women a sense of security and confidence, knowing they’ll always be the “hot one” in the relationship. Plus, a man with a dadbod is always game for Taco Tuesdays—a recurring theme in dadbod discussions, which again, rings true.
Unfortunately, being happily married means this trend doesn’t offer any personal perks for me. However, I’d like to share some dadbod wisdom for those interested.
Here’s how I achieved my dadbod:
- Become a Dad: The journey started here! Parenting responsibilities kept me away from the gym and disrupted my sleep schedule, making those early morning runs a distant memory. Most of my vegetable intake now comes from leftover baby food, while I maintain my weight with Girl Scout cookies and sandwiches.
- Prepare for the Toll: You’ll want to stock up on ibuprofen—carrying strollers, kids, and car seats can wreak havoc on your back and shoulders.
- Forget Grooming: You may find yourself unable to maintain a grooming routine until your child reaches their teenage years. Brushing your teeth becomes a challenge, as you can’t take your eyes off your little one for more than 30 seconds—just long enough to start a minor disaster.
- Weekly Pizza Ritual: Don’t underestimate the importance of ordering pizza every Thursday. It’s crucial to the dadbod lifestyle!
So, while this may seem like a lot of work, it all comes down to embracing a laid-back lifestyle. Maybe I should consider hitting the gym, but who has time for that? If you’re interested in learning more about home insemination, check out this excellent resource. And for those looking into self insemination, you can visit Cryobaby for a comprehensive guide.
In conclusion, the dadbod stands as a celebration of comfort, a signal that one values enjoyment over strict fitness regimens.