When my younger brother, Alex, first mentioned his desire to join the U.S. military, I found myself in disbelief. I thought it was merely a phase rooted in his childhood interest in history and military gadgets, rather than a serious life choice. I also knew our family would share my concern, so I pushed the thought aside.
What were the reasons for our anxiety? Three main points:
- Risk: While I can’t speak for my siblings, I consider myself a pacifist who avoids confrontation. In the face of danger, I instinctively seek safety for my loved ones (and I’m not the fastest runner).
- Perception of America: I often worry about how Americans are viewed globally and wouldn’t want Alex to face backlash for a government he didn’t create.
- Control: It’s not the kind of surrender you might think of. The military’s decisions regarding his assignments and daily routines make me uneasy. I struggle with the idea of someone else controlling his life choices, especially when I never thought this path would interest him.
Unlike me, Alex was genuinely committed. Last year, he enlisted and embarked on his training as a medic. He just graduated, and we were all overwhelmed with joy (and tears) to learn his first posting would be close to home, allowing us to visit without the looming worry of distant, dangerous deployments.
As Memorial Day approaches, my perspective is shifting.
Growing up in a small town, I’ve always cherished our local parade. We stroll down just before it starts, find a shady spot, and enjoy snacks while connecting with familiar faces and meeting new friends. The parade features vintage cars, fire trucks, scouts, local politicians, and community groups. But what really stands out are the soldiers and veterans, the true heroes who receive the loudest cheers.
In the past, I watched them with a sense of detachment. I cheered alongside the crowd, but something changed a few years ago. As the U.S. sent more troops to the Middle East, the soldiers looked increasingly youthful to me. Their uniforms, once reminiscent of classic films, suddenly reminded me of my own children. In that moment, I felt a wave of emotion and began to truly empathize with them.
This year, however, the parade will take on a new significance. I’ll think about how Alex will form bonds with his fellow servicemen and women, experiencing the joys of camaraderie and the heart-wrenching impacts of loss. As a medic, he’ll face the reality of life and death, saving lives while grappling with what it means when he can’t save everyone.
Now, we’re a military family. Unexpectedly so, but here we are. We’re not your typical military family. I don’t believe America is inherently the greatest country, nor do I think any nation is. I believe it’s our responsibility to appreciate our privileges while also questioning the status quo.
I feel it’s my duty to support Alex in every way I can. He enlisted with our total support but also our bewilderment. His strength, both physical and mental, allows him to thrive in this new chapter of his life. He’s found purpose and pride in serving his country, which is nothing short of heroic.
As I watch the soldiers march this Memorial Day, I’ll feel a deep connection with them. They’re now contemporaries of my brother, and we share the same fears, pride, and love as their families do.
For more insights on family and connection during this time, check out this blog post. And if you’re interested in home insemination, Make a Mom provides an excellent resource. You can also explore Rmany’s blog for helpful information on pregnancy and home insemination.
In summary, Memorial Day has grown from just a day for picnics into a profound time of reflection for those of us with loved ones in the military. The connections we share with service members now resonate deeply, reminding us of the sacrifices they make for our freedom.