When it comes to enjoying a scoop of ice cream, there’s always an indication when you’re nearing the bottom of the bowl. You can savor each bite, mentally brace yourself for the last spoonful, and even run out to grab another tub if you need to. But the endings that come with the little moments in life often sneak up on you. It’s challenging to recognize when a routine is about to shift for good.
For 18 years, I had the pleasure of giving my little boy, Ethan, his baths. Each day, I would lather his hair, encouraging him to “close his eyes and lean back,” while I filled a plastic cup with water to rinse away the suds. This was my daily ritual—until one day, it wasn’t.
To my surprise, I didn’t realize right away that this routine had come to an end. It took a few weeks—maybe even a couple of months—before I found myself stirring onions for dinner, when a fleeting thought crossed my mind: I can’t recall the last time I washed Ethan’s hair. This realization hit me hard; what had been so ordinary had quietly slipped away. My little boy had transitioned to taking showers, and while I noticed that change, I hadn’t acknowledged the loss of our cherished bath time.
Naturally, I did what any attentive mother would do. I sought out Ethan, who was preoccupied with his own activities, and casually asked if he wouldn’t mind if I washed his hair that evening. “Sure,” he said, and I felt a wave of gratitude. His simple “yes” gifted me one last opportunity to cherish this moment.
As I soaped up his hair, I took my time—scrubbing a bit longer than necessary and creating playful designs in his thick locks. Memories of countless baths rushed back to me, culminating in this final wash that I would always treasure. I embraced the warmth of the water and the bittersweet realization that this chapter was closing.
How do we remind ourselves to be present in these fleeting moments? Every day, I come across quotes urging me to appreciate the now. I read them with intention, promising to be mindful. Yet, so often, life’s routines dull my awareness. When my eldest child headed off to college, I savored the newfound freedom of making only three lunches instead of four. But that sense of liberation quickly morphed into nostalgia.
With Heritage Day approaching at the middle school, I received one of those familiar SignUpGenius reminders to volunteer. I could contribute water bottles, utensils, or even help serve food. Not long ago, these emails cluttered my inbox, and I often dismissed them, too busy for such commitments. However, now that it’s fifth grade, I recognize that opportunities to engage will soon dwindle. So, I checked the box to volunteer, knowing that this might be one of my last chances to be involved. Embracing this moment will likely spare me from surprise the next time I find myself in the kitchen.
This article was originally published on June 3, 2015.