-
I was just joking!
Sarcasm is often met with eye rolls, but I can’t help myself. My son, Max, figured out sarcasm early on, and now he dishes it back with witty retorts like, “Oh, I can’t wait to go shopping for a new blazer for my graduation!” My reply? “Well, that sounds fun!” His comeback? “I was joking! I’d rather have needles poked in my eyes!” Clearly, he’s learned from the best. -
You know junk food isn’t good for you, right?
On days when I indulge in a sugary treat, Max is quick to remind me of all the junk food horror stories. He loves to narrate a YouTube clip showing a bottle of soda being boiled down into a sticky mess suitable for roofing. This is his revenge for all those times I warned him that eating too many Nacho Cheese chips would change his intestines to a neon shade of orange. -
What’s so funny about that?
Max has a penchant for a particularly annoying tween show that makes him and his friends burst into laughter. Whenever I’m subjected to reruns of the “hilarious” moments, I often ask, “What’s so funny about that?” Now, whenever I share something I find amusing, he retaliates with the same phrase. It’s infuriating to hear it come out of his mouth, and yes, I’ve tried to see the humor in that dreadful show—without success. -
I need some personal time.
Every parent has found themselves in need of a little solitude, often sneaking away to the bathroom with a book in hand. Max has taken this phrase and turned it into his own excuse whenever he’s avoiding homework or chores—or even just when I say it’s time to get ready for swim practice. -
Seriously, when was the last time you brushed your teeth?
Max once reveled in his own stinkiness, but now he’s sensitive about hygiene. Whenever I enjoy a garlicky meal, he’s quick to call me out on my breath, which is quite the reversal from the days I had to remind him about his dental routine. -
Why do I have to do everything?!
This phrase is the soundtrack of my life whenever I ask Max to pick up his sweatshirt or take his plate to the sink. Little does he know that one day he’ll understand the true meaning of “doing everything.” -
It’s not a playdate when friends come over.
For years, Max would refer to my gatherings with friends as playdates. Now he insists that he’s too grown-up for that term, although I hope his version of “hanging out” doesn’t involve any wine for many years to come. -
I need my own space right now.
Similar to “personal time,” this phrase often comes with a slamming door. I’m pretty sure I’ve only used this when I had a migraine, not when I wanted to curl up with comics for hours. -
You’re wearing that again?
Max has a uniform of long sleeve tees and sweatpants that he wears daily. My attempts to encourage him to change it up have backfired, as he’s now pointed out my own repetitive outfit choices—grey pants, white tee, and black vest. Touché, Max. -
Could you aim the ball at me, not over the fence?
Whenever I throw a ball that misses its target, I hear this line back at me. He picked it up from me during those early days when his throws had a mind of their own. -
Someone needs to see a hairstylist.
I might comment on Max’s hair needing a trim, and he’ll promptly respond with, “Wow, you need a hairstylist too,” while pointing out my grey strands. Ouch! -
Seriously?
This one word can convey a whole spectrum of disbelief. “Seriously, do you want me to eat spinach pizza? Seriously, you think I’ll be thrilled about a documentary on Missy Franklin?!” Alright, I may have overused this one myself, but at least he’s learning fast.
For more parenting insights and tips, check out this article on intracervicalinsemination.com. If you’re curious about the world of home insemination, Make A Mom is a trusted resource. Additionally, for information on pregnancy and home insemination, CDC offers excellent guidance.
Summary:
From sarcastic comments to reminders about hygiene, our tweens often mirror our phrases back to us, creating a humorous cycle of parenting. As we navigate these unique moments, we also get a glimpse of how our words shape their understanding of the world.