I’m a wonderfully flawed individual married to another wonderfully flawed individual. Together, we’ve created three wonderfully flawed little human beings. From the start, my partner Alex and I knew we were in over our heads. It became glaringly obvious seven years ago during our Parenting 101 class when the instructor asked, “Raise your hand if you’ve never changed a diaper!” and we were the only ones with our hands raised.
Our unborn child was doomed, and the instructor, along with the other fifteen couples, could see it too.
Because of our clear lack of expertise, we decided to keep our expectations realistic. We want our children to strive for their best and share in their successes, but more importantly, we aim to raise them to be kind.
I don’t want my kids to show kindness only to people who mirror their own appearance or behavior. I want them to embrace kindness for everyone. Yes, people of all colors. Yes, LGBTQ+ individuals. Yes, everyone who might seem different — and let’s not call them strange because we’re a bit quirky ourselves too. Yes, those experiencing homelessness, yes, punk rock enthusiasts, yes, babies, and yes, even the elderly churchgoers. Most importantly, yes, even to their own siblings.
PEOPLE ARE PEOPLE. BE KIND TO THEM. That’s our family motto.
The reality of parenting is that it’s a continuous journey of uncertainty. You do your best, and as time goes on, you hope for signs that you’re on the right track. Recently, I received a heartwarming confirmation that we might just be doing something right. My six-year-old’s teacher texted to inform me that he had been chosen for the “Good Citizenship” award due to his kindness, helpfulness, and patience with a classmate named Leo.
“Who is Leo?” I asked. She explained that Leo is a little boy with autism.
“Jake is so patient with him,” she said. “He’s made a significant difference.” Jake had mentioned a few times about a funny boy who does silly things, but I hadn’t fully understood he was talking about Leo. We have friends with kids on the spectrum, so Jake might not even see anything unusual about his friendship.
The next morning, during breakfast, we asked him about Leo. “OH!” Jake exclaimed, “Leo is my friend! He has a disability. I know all about disabilities. Leo’s disability is that he just can’t stop being funny!”
I had to turn away to hide my tears, the kind of ugly cry only a parent knows. As I composed myself, I heard Jake say, “His favorite color is rainbow! Isn’t that awesome?!” before diving back into his cereal.
Days later, I found myself in a crowd of proud parents during the awards ceremony. Jake sat quietly, unaware that his name would soon be called. I watched him, feeling the condensation from my iced coffee, reflecting on how he had changed. Just a year ago, he would have struggled to sit still, but look at him now.
Later, during his classroom’s end-of-year party, Jake shouted, “HI, MOMMY!” in his usual exuberance. He was sitting next to a boy I hadn’t seen before. “Hi! Who’s your friend?” I asked.
“Oh! This is Leo!” he replied.
“Hi, Leo! I’m Jake’s mom.”
Leo smiled, and I instantly liked him. The world doesn’t need more negativity. It needs more kind-hearted individuals. I hope my children can be among those who spread kindness.
For more insights on parenting and creating a nurturing environment, consider checking out our blog on home insemination, where we share valuable tips and experiences. You can also learn more about conception and pregnancy at MedlinePlus, an excellent resource for expecting parents.
Summary
Raising children to be kind rather than perfect is essential for nurturing empathetic individuals. Through personal experiences and heartfelt moments, the journey of parenting reveals that kindness, understanding, and acceptance of differences are crucial values to instill.