A Year-By-Year Overview of Your 30s

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30: Entering your 30s might hit you with the realization that age is merely a figure. Turning 30 feels strikingly similar to being 29, which mirrored 28, and so forth. Honestly, 30 is just like being 22, but now you have a mortgage to manage!

31: At 31, you start to reflect on whether you took enough chances or enjoyed life to the fullest in your 20s. You might dream about taking a month off to explore Europe or leap from cliffs in Santorini, but then reality hits as you finish changing a diaper, hand the baby to your partner, and finally get around to washing your hair for the first time in days.

32: By the age of 32, you convince yourself that you can still easily pass for 25. You take your toddler out in a jogging stroller and sneak in some sit-ups during nap time. You notice that your body is looking better than it did back in high school. Your 30s are turning out to be AMAZING! Wait, when did my last period happen?

33: When you reach 33, your baby is now four days overdue, and your feet and bikini area have been out of sight for 15 weeks. You find yourself questioning whether to trust your partner with a little grooming down there or to just embrace your natural state at the hospital. Your mom is busy organizing the nursery, while your two-year-old is busy creating a train track maze in your living room. You’ve abandoned your natural birth plan—bring on the Pitocin and epidural because you just want this baby out!

34: At 34, you achieve one of your greatest accomplishments: taking your 1-year-old and 3-year-old to Disney World. Victory achieved!

35: Turning 35 makes you realize that you and your spouse haven’t really connected in months amidst the chaos of work and parenting. Feeling exhausted and a bit distant, you muster the courage to leave the kids with your in-laws for a week and escape to Cancun. There, you lounge at the swim-up bar, share laughs, and sip on delicious margaritas. You dance under the stars, and your partner surprises you with a boat tour through the mangroves. By the time you return home, you’re sun-kissed, joyful, and totally in love again.

36: At 36, your oldest starts kindergarten, and your youngest is off to preschool. No more bottles cluttering the sink or dirty diapers to toss out. The crib is tucked away in the attic, and hand-me-downs are being passed to your nieces and nephews. You finally feel certain that your baby-making days are behind you, and you start planning that family road trip to Graceland. Just as you’re calculating how long your 3-year-old can hold her bladder, you discover a lone pacifier hidden in the couch cushions, and suddenly, you hear that ticking sound—your biological clock might not be completely silent just yet.

37: At 37, you receive an invitation to your high school’s 20-year reunion. You contemplate going for a brief moment but quickly weigh the hassle of leaving the kids with the in-laws and the cost of overpriced dinner tickets for a night with people you mostly avoid online. Instead, you call your best friend, and together you decide a weekend getaway is a much better plan than prime rib or salmon.

38: By 38, the thought of turning 40 starts to loom large. You notice the fine lines on your forehead and ponder how you got “old-lady hands.” Wasn’t it just yesterday that the ’90s felt recent? You begin to realize that life is fleeting, and it’s time to let go of the things that weigh you down—those old fears, worries, and even certain relationships that no longer serve you.

39: As you approach 39, you find comfort in the notion that age is just a number. Sure, that number is now a mere year away from starting with a 4, but you’re not panicking. 39 still feels a lot like 22, just richer in experience. You look in the mirror and think you can easily pass for 35. You’ve packed your newly purchased high-waist bikini next to your partner’s swim trunks and ensured the kids are ready as you all head to the airport. Next stop? Santorini!

In summary, your 30s are a whirlwind of changes, realizations, and adventures that shape your identity and perspective on life. Embrace the journey, cherish the memories, and don’t forget to prioritize self-care along the way. For more insights on home insemination, you might want to check out this helpful resource or explore this at-home insemination kit that could enhance your family planning.