By: Emma Collins
Updated: Jan. 2, 2023
They say youth can be squandered on the young. Looking back, I realize that much of my twenties was spent unraveling my identity. I grappled with the remnants of teenage insecurities and searched for my passions—deciding what I wanted to dedicate my life to. No pressure, right? It wasn’t until my thirties that I truly began to feel at ease with who I am and confident in my choices. If I could somehow travel back in time, here’s what I would tell my younger self:
- Release Toxic Relationships: People change, and so do priorities. If you find yourself in a relationship lacking mutual respect and love, it’s perfectly okay to walk away. In fact, sometimes you need to run. Life is too precious to waste on those who don’t uplift you.
- Stop Obsessing Over Your Appearance: The societal beauty standards are unrealistic for nearly everyone. Don’t stress over your weight, makeup, or fashion choices. True beauty shines from within, deriving from confidence and kindness. Embrace who you are—flaws and all.
- Care Less About Others’ Opinions: Not everyone will adore you, regardless of your efforts. Instead of trying to win over the naysayers, invest your energy in relationships with those who cherish you for who you are. Those connections will last.
- Own Your Happiness: You are in charge of your joy. If your life feels dramatic, refer back to point one. Too busy? Trim your schedule. If you’re still feeling down, adjust your mindset, lower your expectations, and cultivate gratitude. Remember, you can’t make others happy—sorry, but it’s true.
- Travel Early and Often: Embrace adventure! Step outside your comfort zone and explore the world. Traveling helps you grow and expands your perspective. Do it while you’re young and unencumbered—because traveling with kids can be a different ballgame entirely.
- Admit You Don’t Know Everything: It’s easy to feel surrounded by ignorance, but there are always smarter individuals. Seek them out and learn from their experiences. And stop labeling yourself as “old.” It’s just not a flattering way to speak about yourself.
- Embrace Forgiveness: Acknowledging when you’re wrong is a sign of strength, not weakness. Be generous in your forgiveness of others, too. While it won’t erase the past, it will lighten your emotional load and kickstart your healing journey.
- Avoid Speaking Negatively About Loved Ones: Even if you think it’s just harmless venting, negative comments can spread like wildfire and inflict real harm. Choose kindness instead. You may be surprised by how much gossip diminishes when you uplift others.
- Marry for the Right Reasons: Don’t rush into marriage just to check off a societal milestone. Take your time and ensure you’re marrying your soulmate. If you’re not absolutely certain, it’s okay to wait or even reconsider the necessity of marriage altogether.
- Prioritize Self-Care: Don’t hesitate to say no when necessary. If you don’t look after your own needs, who will? Take care of your body by hydrating, resting, and perhaps taking a multivitamin. Make time for relaxation, even if it’s just enjoying a quiet moment with a good book or a pedicure.
It’s amusing how I used to dread turning thirty, but now that I’m here, I’m happier than ever. So, 20-year-old me, know that you won’t just disappear when the decade ends. Just be gentle with yourself—and maybe take it easy on our liver while you’re at it!
For more insights into navigating life’s challenges, check out our other blog post on home insemination here. Additionally, if you’re interested in the science behind family planning and related topics, CDC’s page is an excellent resource. And if you’re looking for a reliable home insemination kit, you can explore options at Make A Mom.
Summary
Reflecting on my twenties, I’ve compiled ten important lessons that would have guided me through that transformative decade. From letting go of toxic relationships to prioritizing self-care, these insights emphasize the importance of self-acceptance, genuine connections, and personal growth.