We all have our judgments, and while some may be more vocal than others, we’ve all created a mental checklist of things we would never do as parents. Yet, more often than not, we find ourselves crawling back to those very promises we swore we wouldn’t break. Meanwhile, some seasoned parent is probably chuckling, saying, “I told you so.” Here’s a look at ten promises many of us have made—only to break them in the chaos of parenthood.
1. No Screens for My Child
Remember when you vowed to keep your little one away from your smartphone or tablet? HA HA HA! It sounded great until you found yourself in a supermarket, desperate to keep your child entertained while they gleefully knocked items off the shelves. Free downloads of games like Strawberry Shortcake suddenly become your lifesaver. Judge me all you want, but when Tylenol fails, the phone comes out!
2. Never Using a Backpack Leash
Standing in line at your local café, you probably shook your head at the mom with a child on a backpack leash. It’s funny how things change—now you’re considering it yourself. When your little tornado decides to run off in a crowded store, you’ll wish you had that pink unicorn leash to keep them close!
3. Home-Cooked Meals Every Night
You might have promised yourself wholesome, home-cooked dinners each evening, but a quick trip to the drive-thru can be just as comforting. Yes, that Happy Meal is looking pretty wholesome right about now, McHypocrite!
4. Maintaining My Pre-Baby Self
You had all these grand plans for organic meals and fitness routines, neatly pinned on your inspiration board. Then reality hit: your six-month-old suddenly becomes a night owl, and suddenly, those plans seem impossible. A few crunches here and there have to make up for that corn dog, right?
5. No Baby Talk
Every day, I find myself speaking in the third person and calling the restroom a “potty.” I’m not sure when I’ll outgrow this phase, but it’s pretty wild when your social life revolves around toddlers!
6. Making Threats I Can’t Keep
You promised you wouldn’t make empty threats. Yet here you are, threatening to take away the TV or call Santa, only to have your child’s eyes light up when they hear the familiar jingles. Santa still visits, and the toy tsunami remains unhindered.
7. “Because I Said So”
As a kid, you swore you’d never resort to this phrase. You’d explain everything so your child would understand. Fast forward to reality, and after the hundredth time asking them to clean up, “BECAUSE I SAID SO” becomes your go-to response!
8. My Child Will Never Behave Like That
You thought you had it all together and would never allow your child to disrupt others in public. Yet here you are, using your phone, threats, and even “because I said so” to try to keep the peace. Karma has a way of showing up when you least expect it.
9. My Home Will Always Be Clean
How hard could it be to maintain a tidy home? You imagined that as a stay-at-home parent, you’d have it all figured out. But the truth is, keeping the house clean while juggling kids is a Herculean task. Sorry to all those I judged before!
10. Using the TV as a Babysitter
You envisioned arts and crafts while cooking dinner, but your child seems disinterested in everything you plan. Enter Nanny Netflix—because sometimes, you just need five minutes to yourself, even if it means letting the TV babysit for a bit.
Don’t beat yourself up. We’ve all been there. Who knew parenting would be this challenging? Now, you can breathe easy, knowing your judgmental days are behind you, and you can enjoy watching someone else navigating the tricky waters of parenting.
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