It’s entirely within the realm of possibility that I’ll find myself stepping into the role of a grandmother in the next decade. My eldest child, if all goes well, will be finishing college soon, and who knows? They might even start contemplating a family of their own. After all, it’s often said that once you start building a nest, it tends to fill up quickly.
In a twist of fate, my youngest could technically father a child right about now, which means I might be in for a surprise grandparenting adventure in the near future. (Cue the fervent wish that my son keeps his pants firmly in check for the next ten years!) The idea of becoming a grandma soon, or even within the next decade, fills me with a mix of excitement and anxiety. It’s been quite some time since I’ve had infants or toddlers around, and I can’t help but wonder if I still have the patience required. Lately, when I hear little ones crying in stores, I find myself feeling more annoyance than maternal instinct. Thoughts like, “Been there, done that!” and “Better you than me!” race through my mind as I savor my quiet shopping experience with a latte in hand.
As my children grow more independent, I relish their autonomy and diminished neediness, and I question my ability to handle the chaos of a new baby or even my own grandchild. Could the experience be different since they’re not my own? Could I, as many grandparents claim, just enjoy the best bits without the responsibilities?
Recently, I had the delightful opportunity to look after my friend’s 18-month-old daughter for a few days. Initially, I worried about how the long hours would unfold. What would we do all day? My last memory of caring for a toddler involved counting the minutes until naptime. However, this time was a revelation. It was absolutely blissful, and I’m convinced I’ll be a fantastic grandma someday. Here’s why:
- Housework? What Housework? I found myself leaving dirty dishes in the sink without a second thought. When that little girl beamed at me while munching on Cheerios, all concerns about housework evaporated. In that moment, nothing else mattered. I felt a wave of relief wash over me, wishing I could relive those carefree days with my boys without the constant worry about my home’s appearance.
- Embracing the Power of “Yes.” I became a “yes” mom, at least more than I had been seven years ago. Yes, you can pull out all the Tupperware and make a delightful racket. Yes, ice cream before lunch is totally acceptable. Yes, we can model shoes on the coffee table. Yes, I’ll buy that tea set and those glittery shoes, knowing they’ll likely be discarded moments later. I’m finally seeing the bigger picture and letting the small stuff slide.
- Naps Are Sacred. When she napped, I took the opportunity to rest instead of tackling my endless to-do list. I laid down beside that sweet-smelling girl and closed my eyes, allowing myself to simply be. The world didn’t stop spinning, and when I woke up, I felt rejuvenated instead of guilty. The chores would still be there, but they didn’t hold the same weight.
- Time Flew By. The days with her whizzed past, and I was astonished by how relaxed I felt. We sang, laughed, and even took selfies together. I played with toys on the floor, which I hadn’t done in ages. Was it merely a different perspective that allowed me to enjoy our time together? Or was it the fact that I was experiencing the joy of grandparenting, where I only got the best parts?
I understand now why my own mother always shares glowing reports about my children when they spend time with her. They seem so well-behaved and easygoing, a stark contrast to their usual antics at home. Perhaps it’s because she’s seen the bigger picture and understands how fleeting childhood can be. This perspective allows her to be a different kind of parent—and ultimately, a different kind of grandparent.
While I’m not quite in the grandparenting mindset yet, I feel confident I’ll get there. When the day came for my niece to pick up her daughter, I felt fulfilled rather than drained. I had given my best self to that little girl, and it was a joy rooted in years of parenting experience. It’s interesting that, despite the abundance of parenting advice out there, there seems to be a lack of resources for grandparenting. Maybe that’s because, when the time comes, we’ll simply know how to do it right. I can’t wait to embrace that role!
For more insights on parenting and related topics, check out this excellent resource on pregnancy and consider exploring this other blog post for additional information.
Summary
The author reflects on the potential of becoming a grandmother in the near future and shares her recent experience caring for a toddler. Through this experience, she realizes that she can embrace a more relaxed and joyful approach to caregiving, prioritizing fun and connection over household chores. With a new perspective, she feels optimistic about her future role as a grandparent.