“Goodnight, kiddos!”
“‘Night!” I wave my hand from the couch, enjoying the comforting glow of Netflix during this phase of parenthood. Sure, having tweens comes with its challenges, but one major benefit is their ability to tuck themselves in and sleep through the night. What a relief!
When I turned 40, I didn’t dwell on my new wrinkles or the sagging skin. Instead, I promised myself, “I’m going to enjoy some serious sleep and make up for all those years of sleepless nights with babies.” Then one night, I kissed my husband goodnight and rolled over, dreaming of uninterrupted slumber until my bladder or a fire alarm interrupted me…
“Znnnh…”
What on earth was that?
“Hey, did you just say something?” Silence. My husband has an uncanny ability to fall asleep the moment he hits the pillow. As I started to drift off, I heard it again: a strange choking sound escaping from his nose: “Znh!”
Oh no, he didn’t!
Being the caring and attentive wife I am, I gently nudged him. He shot up like I had just poked him with a cattle prod. “What?”
“Roll over! You’re snoring!” I whispered fiercely.
And that was the beginning of my new era of sleep disruption. At first, it was just an occasional disturbance—maybe once a week. Now, it happens every night. I’ve always had trouble falling asleep; I need two things to drift off: darkness and quiet. So this new noise was a major issue. Seriously? Just when I thought I’d reached the ultimate milestone of parenthood—regular nightly sleep—my spouse was determined to keep me awake?
I was resolute. “It was nice knowing you, but I think we need separate bedrooms from now on.”
“Oh, really? Should we just get separate houses while we’re at it?” he quipped.
“Sure! Can I have the bigger one? You can take the guest shed in the backyard and come in for ‘visits’.”
When we shared our amusing plan for separate rooms with friends, some found it amusing while others were baffled (sorry, Dad). But the truth is, we’re not the only ones facing this dilemma. Just mention “snoring” to couples, and you’ll see accusations fly faster than if you asked who’s worse at loading the dishwasher. Many are sleeping in separate bedrooms, on couches, or even in their kids’ rooms, all in the name of getting some precious rest.
For now, we’ve found a workable compromise. My evening routine consists of setting my alarm, charging my phone, and then… inserting my earplugs. I managed to find some that muffle my husband’s snoring while still allowing me to hear important sounds like severe weather alerts or the unmistakable sounds of a child getting sick in the bathroom.
I consider myself lucky; my husband is fairly slim, and when he snores, it sounds more like he’s trimming small branches rather than felling a giant tree. I’ve shared spaces with larger individuals diagnosed with sleep apnea, and that’s a whole different level of torture. Those folks sound like they’re trying to take down an entire forest when they fall asleep!
If you’re dealing with this issue, you know it’s no joke. Sleep deprivation can have serious effects. During nursing school, I learned that lack of sleep can impair performance similarly to being drunk. Additionally, heavy snorers often struggle with oxygen levels at night, leading to fatigue and irritability. There are sleep clinics that specialize in diagnosing sleep apnea, so coughs and adopts a pharmaceutical commercial voice consult your doctor if you think this might apply to you or someone you care about. If your snoring partner is resistant to visiting a sleep clinic, there are many over-the-counter aids you can discreetly place on their nightstand. (Note: Offering a few favors if they wear them can be a fun way to encourage compliance!)
For the record, my husband claims I snore too, but I call nonsense. I’ve never heard it!
If you want to learn more about home insemination, check out this informative post. For additional insights on fertility, visit this authority site. And for guidance on pregnancy and home insemination, this resource is excellent.
In summary, navigating the challenges of snoring can be tough on relationships. Finding solutions, like earplugs or separate sleeping arrangements, might be necessary for some couples. But with a little humor and understanding, it’s possible to work through this common issue while maintaining your sanity.