Dear Friend,
You knew me before I embraced the journey of motherhood with a child who has unique needs. We’ve shared countless joyful moments and navigated through the tough times too. There are thoughts I’ve kept to myself, as they’re not the kind of things people usually voice. Since becoming Lily’s mom, I’ve seen many friendships fade, but you have remained.
On most days, I feel a sense of isolation. It’s not that I am physically alone—there are always people around—but finding time to truly connect feels impossible. It’s challenging to dive deep when it’s been so long since we last caught up. Thank you for asking me those meaningful questions, like, “How are things at home?” and “Are you taking care of yourself?” Those conversations mean the world to me.
I often grapple with guilt for declining your invitations. Our schedule revolves around therapy during the women’s group meetings you invite me to. By evening, I’m typically wiped out, leaving me unable to join you for that exercise class. Weekend getaways are out of reach since we don’t have respite care available. But I genuinely appreciate your invitations. Each text from you reminds me that I haven’t completely vanished from your life. Thank you for your understanding when I have to cancel our lunch plans at the last moment. I wouldn’t want a friend like myself, yet I truly need a friend like you.
The happiest moments for me are when you include my daughter in your plans. I know it requires extra effort, like checking for wheelchair accessibility, and I can’t express how much I appreciate your thoughtfulness. Your kids are so kind-hearted and inclusive; you’re raising such wonderful little humans!
There are days that really test my limits, and that’s when you shine. You text me on days filled with surgeries, bring meals when I’m at the hospital, and find ways to support my other children. I often wonder if I could be as supportive a friend to you if our roles were reversed.
Since our children are the same age, other moms might chat about potty training or readiness for kindergarten. Instead, you celebrate Lily’s milestones—like her first steps—years after your son’s. Many others struggle to hear about another medication or procedure without feeling pity, but you listen and truly understand.
Moms like me need friends like you. Please, continue to reach out, include me, and keep inviting Lily along. If you’re interested in more insights on parenting, check out this blog post on home insemination kit for additional support.
Sincerely,
Your Friend
In summary, maintaining friendships while navigating the unique challenges of parenting a child with special needs can be difficult, but having understanding and supportive friends can make all the difference. It’s essential to keep those connections alive, even when life becomes overwhelming.