Eight years ago, I embarked on the journey of fatherhood at just 24 years old. I was overwhelmed, clueless, and nervous, leading me to make some regrettable remarks to my partner. Reflecting on those days fills me with remorse, so here’s a little advice for new dads out there based on my blunders.
1. When can we resume intimacy?
Oh, really? You’re concerned about a dry spell? Your partner just endured the enormous physical toll of childbirth (whether it was a C-section or a natural birth), and you’re worried about your own desires? Come on, man. Your partner’s body just accomplished an incredible feat, and she deserves time to heal. Be considerate and give her the space she needs; she’s earned it.
2. When are we getting back to exercising?
Nice try on the “we” there! What your partner hears is, “You need to start shedding that baby weight.” You just reaffirmed a fear many women have after childbirth. Remember why you fell in love with her in the first place—her kindness and spirit—rather than just her appearance. Give her time to adjust to her new role and body.
3. I’m so exhausted.
Yes, parenting is tiring for everyone involved. But telling your partner about your fatigue might make her feel obligated to support you emotionally. That’s not her role right now; she’s busy healing and caring for your newborn. Instead of complaining, find ways to support each other without adding pressure to your partner.
4. Do I have to change the baby?
Absolutely, yes! You’re a dad now, and parenting is a team effort. Don’t shy away from dirty diapers; embrace the responsibility. Changing diapers is not only necessary, but it’s also a chance for you to bond with your child. Be proud of your role and step up to help your family thrive.
5. Three months off work sounds like a vacation.
No, it’s not a vacation; it’s recovery time for your partner. She’s healing and forming a connection with your little one. If only you could experience the same time off to bond as a family. What you’re really feeling is the frustration of not getting paternity leave, which is a valid concern. Support your partner and cherish this time together.
For additional insights, check out this resource on pregnancy and home insemination and explore more on artificial insemination for a deeper understanding of family planning. If you’re curious about navigating the journey of parenthood, our blog on family matters offers valuable tips!
In summary, being mindful of your words during the early days of parenthood can significantly impact your relationship with your partner. It’s essential to support each other and embrace the changes that come with welcoming a new life into your family.