As I watch my 16-year-old son, Ethan, I can’t help but notice how much more thoughtful he is compared to my younger self. I often find myself too focused on what he should be doing next, rather than appreciating the wonderful qualities he possesses. This summer, I decided to take a step back and enjoy the young man he is becoming.
Due to my somewhat chaotic planning (third child, countless summers = no fresh ideas), Ethan has taken the initiative to create his own summer schedule. He’s been busy helping a neighbor with gardening, walking another neighbor’s ailing spouse, and visiting his grandmother daily to throw the ball for her dog while listening to her stories. He’s also become the go-to tech expert for his other grandmother and the fishing buddy for his little cousins. Between all of this, he plays basketball, determined to improve his skills in the sport he loves. He’s kind, funny, and full of ambition.
As he heads out to work on a nearby yard, he often checks in with me about which weeds to pull. I remind him about the essentials of yard work: wear sunscreen, a hat, gloves, and insect repellent, and be cautious of poison ivy. And as he walks away, headphones in and phone in hand, I remember my own teenage mishaps with poison ivy—the relentless itching and blistering reminders of youthful recklessness. It’s funny how, at almost 50, life feels different; my friends in their 60s and 70s assure me I’m still young, yet sometimes I feel like I’m slowly descending the mountain of youth.
Recently, Ethan came to sit at the end of my bed, just as he does every night to say goodnight. After returning from a party, he shared that a girl called him pretty. “It was weird,” he said. Moments like these are precious, and I savor every one of them. He truly is a special young man—maybe even someone’s “heaven.”
Though I’ve traveled a similar path before him, I don’t know what songs will mark his teenage years. The music that resonates with him will become a soundtrack to his own journey, much like the tunes that echo from my past now play on oldies stations.
At my age, I still enjoy a catchy tune. Occasionally, I’ll hear a classic from my youth and reflect on how much has changed. As I listened to a Simon & Garfunkel song recently, a line struck me profoundly: “now the years are rolling by me; they’re rockin’ evenly.” It’s a reminder that while I am older than I once was, I am also younger than I will be.
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In summary, as I navigate parenthood with a teenager, I find myself reflecting on the journey and the music that will shape his story. The challenges and joys of raising a teenager are immense, and I cherish the moments we share, knowing he is on his own path.