Parenting
When my little one voiced his anxiety about starting first grade, I couldn’t help but draw from my own memories, a reaction that would impress even the most seasoned psychologists. Like many families, we are immigrants; my husband and I moved to North America a few years back. While we primarily speak English at home, our son, Leo, has become quite proficient in reading and writing it.
He’s familiar with his new school environment, having visited several times with his senior kindergarten class, and he’s been playing in the schoolyard since he was a toddler. With prior preschool experiences at the same facility, he knows some teachers and even a few hidden corners of the building. This contrasts sharply with my own experiences from years ago, where everything felt foreign and intimidating.
I often find myself concerned about my ability to connect with Leo, as I feel that our differences in gender and background sometimes create a gap between us. In this instance, I realized I missed a chance to create a deeper connection by simply listening. Instead of focusing on his feelings, I allowed my own past to dominate the conversation. I didn’t need to offer solutions; I needed to provide a space for him to express himself.
Tomorrow, when Leo wakes up, I know I won’t be perfect. I’ll likely overlook other important cues, but I plan to revisit the topic of first grade. I’ll ask him, as children often do, “Why?” and this time, I’ll truly listen to his thoughts.
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In summary, it’s essential to create an environment where our children feel safe to express their fears. By listening and validating their feelings, we can foster a stronger bond and help them navigate their emotional landscape.