Updated: July 2, 2020
Originally Published: Aug. 25, 2015
Back in my early twenties, I was juggling minimal responsibilities and stressing over psychology exams, yet I felt overwhelmed by the uncertainty of my future. Why does the thought of an open-ended path cause such panic in our twenties? The lack of direction left me anxious and unsure of what steps to take next.
Now, reflecting on those days, I can’t help but chuckle at my youthful concerns. Sure, I still deal with stress, evidenced by a few premature gray hairs, but my worries have shifted. Nowadays, my biggest fears include Justin Bieber, Snapchat, and the occasional carbohydrate—oh, and Donald Trump, for obvious reasons.
As we navigate through life, there comes a moment when we experience a profound shift in perspective. We start to embrace who we are and feel a sense of contentment. Eventually, we figure out the majority of our lives while accepting the mysteries that still lie ahead.
As a mother of two, a bill payer, and a meal planner, I find myself more satisfied than ever. I’ve come to terms with my imperfections and acknowledged that my metabolism isn’t what it used to be. Gone are the days of late-night escapades; now, I prefer a good night’s sleep and the benefits it brings, like fewer dark circles and headaches.
I’ve learned to value things like fiber and SPF 50, and I now appreciate the comfort of stretchy jeans and the joy of finding treasures at flea markets. I’m well-versed in the housing market and can recommend a stellar realtor. Plus, I now find excitement in deals like buy one, get one free coupons and double-paned windows.
I’m genuinely happy with where I am, even if it might seem boring to some. I don’t need validation from anyone in an Ed Hardy shirt or approval from a group of millennial hipsters. I have a growing career, a wonderfully chaotic family, and the ability to whip up a margarita like a pro.
If I could take a trip back in time to that small studio apartment, I would tell the young woman fretting over her outfit to just choose something and breathe. Seriously. No one will remember the bland tank top you wore out or the countless times you switched majors while justifying your love for Hootie and the Blowfish.
I wish I could tell her that the stress of those midterms will seem trivial compared to the challenge of getting a child to eat their vegetables. I’d encourage her to stop trying to please everyone else and to let go of the weight of their opinions.
I’d remind her that it’s perfectly fine to assert herself and to do so without apology. I’d tell her that she won’t have all the answers and to stop searching for them in the plotlines of shows like Grey’s Anatomy.
Most importantly, I’d let her know that her life will turn out completely differently than she imagined—and so much better.
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Summary
In reflecting on the anxieties of my twenties, I realize that life evolves, and so do our worries. What once felt overwhelming has transformed into a deeper understanding of self and a greater appreciation for the simple joys of life. Embracing who we are and letting go of the need for validation can lead to a more fulfilling existence.