Let’s be honest: I’d rather wait until my kids are sound asleep and my partner is home from work than take my little darlings on a grocery expedition. Sure, I understand that many parents do this out of necessity and there are even Pinterest tutorials touting grocery outings as educational adventures in nutrition and math. But honestly? I just don’t want to.
Grocery shopping used to be my little escape—a mini retreat where I could leave the chaos of the day behind and step into a serene space filled with my favorite foods. The aisles felt like a well-organized sanctuary, and I’d stroll through with my shopping list, occasionally stopping to browse the seasonal aisle for the latest bestsellers. In those moments, I was alone with my thoughts, free to pick out ingredients for meals I was eager to cook. It was a refreshing experience, a highlight of my week.
Then, I had two energetic, chatty kids who followed me everywhere. When they were toddlers, let’s just say it was a bit of a nightmare. The constant running in opposite directions, the urgent “I have to go potty!” moments while the baby sister snoozed in the cart—it was all too much. Fast forward to now, and the same kids suddenly transform into demanding little barnacles the moment we approach the grocery store. It’s not just my kids; I’ve witnessed this phenomenon with others as well, and it’s utterly exhausting.
So, I’m throwing in the towel. I love my kids far too much to spend my grocery runs feeling frustrated. Here’s a list of reasons why I’ve decided to shop solo from now on:
- I have a stash of their “art projects” in my trunk, along with toys I’ve discreetly removed from the house—I can’t risk them meddling with my purge.
- I prefer not to have items like ice cream, puppies, and candy added to my shopping list while I’m driving.
- It would be nice to enjoy the radio without a barrage of questions like, “Mom, what does ‘tap that’ mean?”
- I’d rather not have to erase the evidence of my child swinging the car door open and hitting the neighboring vehicle.
- The air conditioning is always too chilly for my kids, and I don’t want another “I told you so” moment.
- They love maybe seven different foods yet insist on wanting 23 items from each aisle.
- I like my Achilles tendon intact, so I’d rather avoid the mini metal carts they want to push.
- Those shopping carts shaped like cars? No thanks. They’re germy and make me anxious.
- Yelling, “STAY TO THE RIGHT!” in my overly cheerful voice is not my idea of fun.
- I don’t want to deal with sneaky items in the cart that I then have to hand over to an unsuspecting cashier.
- Precariously stacked items are just too tempting for little hands.
- I have to apologize to far fewer people when I’m pushing the cart and actually paying attention.
- Nineties music is my jam, and I want to dance freely without an audience.
- Explaining the circle of life by the lobster tank one more time might just make me curse.
- It’s way easier to buy the cookies I stash away when the kids are absent.
- I really don’t need to hear how vegetables “taste like butt” today—I’m buying them anyway.
- The fear of encountering a candy-free checkout and the ensuing meltdown is real.
So, if you spot me late one evening wandering the aisles of the grocery store in my pajamas, happily shopping to the beat of INXS, you’ll understand my choice. I have a feeling I won’t be alone in this nighttime grocery adventure.
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Summary
Grocery shopping alone provides a peaceful reprieve from the chaos of parenthood, allowing for a stress-free experience away from the demands of children. From avoiding meltdowns to enjoying the music, shopping at night is the new go-to for many parents.