As a mother of five and expecting baby number six, I’m starting to feel the pressure of unwanted remarks even before my baby bump becomes obvious. While I cherish my growing family, I can’t help but cringe at the thought of the well-meaning but often irritating comments I might hear when I venture out with my little crew. It’s not just me; many moms with larger families share the same sentiments.
So, if you encounter a busy, perhaps slightly frazzled pregnant mom managing several (three or more) lively children at the store or elsewhere, here are five things you should definitely avoid saying:
- “Looks like you’ve got your hands full!” Thanks for the reminder, Captain Obvious! While this comment isn’t the worst, it’s something we hear daily. Whether we have all our kids with us or just a few, this phrase quickly wears thin.
- “Don’t you understand how that happens?” Actually, we do, but thanks for the condescension! It’s 2023, and I assure you, educated women like us are well aware of the facts of life. Please don’t feel the need to elaborate, especially with curious little ears nearby.
- “I hope you’re planning to get fixed after this one.” First off, neither I nor my family is broken, thank you very much. Our reproductive choices are personal, and it’s best to keep them that way. If you wouldn’t want to discuss your own private matters, maybe think twice before asking about mine.
- “Are you trying to overpopulate the planet?” Not at all! We’re merely trying to create a loving home. Besides, our kids will likely contribute to the economy and society in the future, perhaps even supporting you down the road, so a little gratitude wouldn’t hurt.
- “How do you manage it all?” Honestly, we’re just winging it! If we had some grand secret to maintaining sanity with a big family, we’d be writing bestsellers and hiring help. Instead, we handle each day as it comes, and on good days, we might even indulge in a glass of wine!
So, what can you say to a pregnant mom of many that won’t leave her feeling flustered? Here are a few friendly alternatives:
- “What a lovely family you have!”
- “You look wonderful!”
- “Can I offer you some chocolate?”
Or, simply smile warmly and offer silent support; it’s a rare and appreciated gift when we have so much noise around us. We’ll notice your kindness and appreciate it deeply.
For more insights on family building and parenting, check out this informative blog post. If you’re curious about at-home insemination, you can learn more about the process at Make A Mom and explore options at Resolve.
In summary, while well-meaning, many comments can be frustrating for pregnant moms with larger families. A little kindness and understanding go a long way, and we’d love to hear supportive words instead!