50 Reasons I Feel Caught in the Middle

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Updated: July 31, 2016
Originally Published: October 12, 2015

At 46, I find myself firmly in the middle age territory. Let’s face it: most of us don’t make it to 92, so it’s likely that I’m on the downward slope. While I certainly don’t feel old, my youthful days are clearly behind me. This is why I’ve come to appreciate the term “tween”—a word that captures a unique group navigating their own limbo. We deserve a term that feels better than “middle-aged.” Perhaps something like “seasoned youth” or “youthful elder” could work. I’ll keep brainstorming!

In the meantime, here are 50 reasons why I feel like I’m in a limbo of sorts:

1. I’ve outgrown the miniskirt phase.
2. I’m still too young to dismiss new music as “that noise.”
3. I’m too seasoned to tolerate nonsense.
4. I’m too young to utter, “Back in my day…”
5. I’m past the age for neck-jarring rides at amusement parks.
6. I’m still young enough to not need bladder protection.
7. I’m too old to be called “hot.”
8. I’m too young to be referred to as “handsome.”
9. My hair is no longer silky and shiny.
10. I’m too young for a boring, practical haircut.
11. I’m too old to indulge in excessive drinking.
12. I’m too young to be relegated to prune juice and Maalox.
13. I’m too mature to lack conviction in my beliefs.
14. I’m too young to fully own my wisdom.
15. I’m past the prime body I had at 25.
16. I’m still young enough to dream about having that body again.
17. I’m too old to consider having more kids.
18. I’m still young enough to not have grandchildren (yet).
19. I’m too old to grasp the appeal of fan fiction, memes, and anime.
20. I’m too young to dismiss my curiosity about them.
21. I know I won’t be the first woman to defy aging with lotions— alas, that ship has sailed.
22. I’m too young to accept that my wrinkles will only multiply.
23. I’m too old to master walking in heels.
24. I’m too young to wear those unflattering orthopedic shoes.
25. I’m too old for sultry moves on the dance floor.
26. I’m too young to give up dancing—only when I die!
27. I’m too old to let life’s little joys go unnoticed.
28. I’m still young enough to find joy in simply being able to move in the morning.
29. Being called a girl feels outdated.
30. I’m too young to be addressed as “ma’am” or “lady.” Honestly, I still cherish being called “miss.” Let me live!
31. I’m too old for shiny makeup and glitter.
32. I’m too young to draw on my lips or eyebrows.
33. I’m too old to spend two hours on a terrible movie—I’d rather clean my kitchen.
34. I’m too young to snooze through a good film.
35. Fast food doesn’t sit well with me anymore, even if I occasionally crave it.
36. I’m too young to need fiber with every meal.
37. I’m too old to forget sunscreen.
38. I’m still young enough for a quick morning routine—let’s hit the beach already!
39. I’m too old to understand why people think Lady Gaga is anything but a Madonna wannabe.
40. I’m too young to resist tapping my foot in the elevator.
41. Sleeping on the cold, hard ground? No thanks, I’m too old for that.
42. Group tours? Definitely not for me!
43. I’m too old for car escapades.
44. I’m too young to limit myself to just a bed.
45. I’m too aware that any new physical activity will have consequences later.
46. I’m too young to stop exploring new experiences.
47. I’m too old for a reliable short-term memory.
48. I’m too young for my long-term memories to be all I have left.
49. I’m too old to tick off everything on my bucket list.
50. I’m still young enough to keep adding new adventures to it.

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Summary:

Navigating the complexities of middle age can leave one feeling caught between youth and maturity. In this lighthearted exploration, I outline 50 reasons why I often feel in limbo—too old for certain youthful pursuits, yet too young for the realities of aging.