The internet is flooded with stories about the whirlwind of transitioning from one child to two. Trust me, I’ve spent countless sleepless nights scrolling through articles while nursing my newborn, all illuminated by the soft glow of my smartphone.
Let me be clear: the leap to having two kids is no walk in the park.
I’ve heard from other parents that this transition is the toughest—more so than going from zero to one and definitely more challenging than adding a third child. Supposedly, once you hit three, everything else is a breeze, and you can just keep adding kids without a hitch.
I suspect this transition feels especially intense right now because our daughter recently turned two. At this age, she’s clever enough to voice her opinions and articulate her desires, yet still clumsy and unpredictable, reminiscent of a tipsy college friend who’s lost her shoes and can’t quite remember how to navigate a bathroom.
To add to the mix, we recently dove into potty training her. We hadn’t planned on tackling this just yet—after all, we cherish our sanity—but an angry rash on her thigh necessitated some diaper-free time for air exposure to help it heal. She’s been quite comfortable with her little Elmo potty, but when it comes to “poo poo,” she gets anxious, clenching her cheeks and refusing to go on the potty while scolding us for even thinking about putting a diaper back on. Ah, toddlers.
As we adjust to our new routine, I experienced a particularly memorable “shitshow” just a few nights ago, right around the three-week mark with our newborn son. This was my first evening alone with both kids while my partner was out for a work event.
Now, let me emphasize that this was quite daunting for me, given I was still recovering from a C-section. Only recently had I been able to lift our daughter without feeling like my abdomen was on fire. You don’t realize how crucial your core strength is until it’s compromised—lifting her in and out of her crib or even just holding her hand while she navigates stairs is a challenge.
So, my husband left, and I thought, “I can handle this!” I got our baby to sleep in his swing and sat down for a peaceful Lego session with my toddler. All seemed calm until I made the rookie mistake of trying to cook dinner.
Yes, I know. In hindsight, a poor choice. But the baby was asleep, and my daughter was occupied! Little did I know, chaos was just around the corner.
Halfway through chopping onions, the newborn woke up, wailing like an impatient diner. I quickly scooped him up and started nursing him on the couch.
That’s when I noticed my toddler’s far-off gaze. A fleeting realization hit me—she was pooping. And, of course, she wasn’t wearing a diaper.
“Mama, I go poo poo,” she announced.
Staying calm, I replied, “Oh, do you need to go to the potty?” Just then, I witnessed a small piece of poop fall from her as we shuffled towards the bathroom.
Before I knew it, there were more “surprises” decorating our rug. My son was still nursing, and I needed to act swiftly. So, I took her hand and carefully maneuvered her to the bathroom, all while cradling our baby.
If someone had seen us—me with a nursing baby, my daughter dropping nuggets as we walked, and half of my shirt exposed—it would have been a scene worthy of an audition for a chaotic circus act.
We made it upstairs, dodging little “gifts” along the way. Finally, I got her on the potty just in time for a tiny victory—a single poop made it in. We celebrated this success with a little dance, because, why not?
After cleaning up the aftermath and settling back down on the couch with my son, I heard my husband’s key in the door. “Wow, it’s so calm in here! Everything okay?”
I could only stare at him blankly. I wanted to share the chaos of the evening, but my energy was spent. Later, I found myself laughing hysterically at the absurdity of it all, perhaps making him think I’d lost my mind. But we survived! My eldest had her mishap, and my youngest had his fair share of messes, too. Just a snapshot of our life adjusting from one to two kids.
I keep reminding myself that this is just a phase, and it won’t always be this chaotic. And hey, if you hear of any auditions for a parenting version of Cirque du Soleil, please let them know I’d be a perfect fit for the role!
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Summary
Transitioning from one child to two can feel overwhelming and chaotic, especially when navigating new challenges like potty training. The experience of managing two little ones can lead to unexpected and humorous situations, but it’s all part of the journey. Embracing the chaos with a sense of humor can help parents maintain their sanity during this phase.