This year marks the beginning of my sons’ journey into the world of football, and it has been quite the adventure for our family. When the initial practice sessions began, both my boys, along with many teammates, were novices to the game; they were unfamiliar with the rules, not to mention how to properly strap on their football gear. Thankfully, they were fortunate to have an understanding coach who recognized that these young athletes are in second, third, and fourth grades and that the primary goal is to have fun while learning.
Our coach adheres strictly to the league’s regulations regarding practice hours, instilling a sense of discipline and the importance of following rules, even when others might not. Our team started the season with just 11 players, barely enough to cover all positions on the field, and without substitutes. This meant that the boys had to play both offense and defense continuously, with only one additional player joining later to step in if someone was injured—against teams that had their own roster of substitutes! It’s true; every opposing team had at least double our players, with some fielding nearly all fourth-graders, while we only had two.
Each game felt like a classic David-and-Goliath scenario, but unfortunately, David has yet to taste victory. As a mother, it’s been incredibly challenging to witness their struggles. I see how far they’ve come, the effort they’ve put in, yet they consistently find themselves outmatched. With each fumble and missed tackle, I feel a pang of disappointment for them, and I worry they might lose confidence and shy away from new challenges despite the potential I see in them.
Despite these losses, my boys remain undeterred, showing up with enthusiasm at every game, eagerly running through the spirit line alongside their cheerleaders, who hold up celebratory signs. They genuinely want to win and care about the outcome, but their resilience in facing defeat inspires me. We celebrate their progress and encourage them to continue pushing forward. Witnessing their growth from being completely clueless at the start to successfully executing plays is nothing short of remarkable.
I’ve shared with them the idea that sometimes, losing can motivate us to work harder, making eventual victories all the more rewarding. Anticipating their first win feels like waiting for Christmas morning without a calendar in sight. The frustration of not being able to expedite their journey, combined with my instinct to control the situation, has been tough for this Type-A mom. However, reminding myself that it’s their journey to embrace the lessons learned from setbacks helps me maintain perspective. I’ve come to realize that this experience is not just about my sons growing but also about my own evolution as a parent.
I find myself transitioning from a protective figure to a supportive coach, navigating this new phase of our lives together. While I love sharing my experiences to guide them, I’m also stepping into uncharted territory. Reflecting on my own failures and disappointments gives me hope that these challenges will strengthen them, but ultimately, the decisions are theirs to make.
Parenting encompasses not just teaching and guiding but also personal development. I am choosing to navigate this new emotional landscape while helping them through situations I’ve faced, and though it can be overwhelming, it’s exhilarating to witness our mutual growth. We’re both learning that not winning doesn’t define you as a “loser,” and that failure can pave the way to success. Raising resilient individuals who can learn from setbacks will be one of my proudest achievements, and even though my kids hold the reins, I’m coaching them with everything I have.
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