There’s a phrase I find myself repeating more often than I’d like: just go and play. As parents, we often wish our kids would take the initiative and dive into their own imaginative worlds. I mean, why do my children seem to need constant guidance? Can’t they just figure it out on their own?
I often feel like the Entertainment Coordinator of a never-ending cruise. “First, we’ll be building with blocks, and after lunch, we’ll have a Zingo tournament in the living room.” And that’s not even addressing outdoor play! I have to almost force them out the door, putting on their shoes, dressing them, and actively joining them just to get them outside.
What I really want is for them to play independently in the house while I tackle my own tasks. I dream of the day they can entertain themselves without needing me to orchestrate every single game or resolve every little disagreement.
My daily mantra to my 6-year-old son might go something like this:
- “Your sister is ready to play whatever you choose; just let her join.”
- “She’s been looking forward to your return from school all day.”
- “Believe me, I played with my brother all the time when I was your age.”
- “Your sister and you are so close in age, you should bond like we did.”
- “I didn’t have my mom playing with me; she was busy working.”
- “Go downstairs and have fun.”
- “I’m making dinner now.”
- “Mommy needs to work for a bit.”
- “Daddy’s at work, too.”
And then there was the time I told my daughter, “Dora goes on all sorts of exciting adventures by herself—with just a talking monkey, mind you.” She’s surprisingly good at entertaining herself, but my son? Not so much.
I know I’m not the only one facing this challenge. Many of my friends with multiple kids share similar frustrations—often, their children don’t know how to play together without adult intervention. When we have playdates, I secretly rejoice when the kids engage with each other, leaving me free to breathe.
Modern parenting has its quirks, including our trendy open floor plans. While I love the idea of being able to see my kids while I cook, I can’t help but think of how my mother had her own space to be productive. She could easily disappear into her office while we entertained ourselves throughout the house or the neighborhood. We played outside freely, and her absence didn’t mean neglect; it meant we were trusted to explore and have fun on our own.
In contrast, here I am in my beautiful, open-concept kitchen, always on display thanks to that wireless technology. I can’t help but wonder if future generations will long for separate spaces that allow parents to find a little escape. Kids should have the freedom to be kids, don’t you think?
I see glimmers of independence in my kids, ages 6 and 4, and I know they won’t always need me hovering nearby. Soon enough, they’ll be off on their own adventures. Until then, I’ll play princesses with my daughter, roll the dice with my son in Chutes and Ladders, and then encourage them to just go and play while I fold the laundry. And hey, if you’re interested in more parenting insights, check out this piece on home insemination for some practical tips!
In summary, as parents, we often find ourselves in a balancing act between guiding our children and letting them explore independently. It’s essential for their development to learn how to play without direction. We’re all navigating this together, and resources like Resolve can provide valuable information on family-building options for those on that journey. And if you’re looking to enhance your journey, consider checking out Make A Mom for fertility supplements.