Updated: Aug. 3, 2016
Originally Published: Feb. 24, 2016
In my early twenties, I felt like I was in peak condition. Weighing about 120 pounds, I dedicated an hour each day to yoga. For the first time, I could see my abs, and I felt long, lean, and flexible. It was empowering to be strong—there was definitely a spiritual and personal strength to it. But, I won’t deny that vanity played a role; I loved feeling beautiful and finally had the figure I had always desired.
That phase of perfection was short-lived. Life got busier, my yoga practice dwindled, and I found myself indulging in unhealthy foods. The weight crept back on, and my body began to soften. Then I became a mother, and I think you can guess how the story unfolds from there.
Now, I’m about 15 years and 15 pounds away from what I once considered my fittest self. I’ve had two children and have been a stay-at-home parent for nearly a decade. Sometimes, I lament those extra pounds and the lack of time I have for exercise.
Yet, alongside the weight gain, I’ve acquired a valuable insight. I’ve come to understand that the ideal body I had in my twenties is unattainable as I approach 40. More crucially, I’ve learned that there are far more significant things in life than a perfectly toned physique.
Even if I returned to my previous exercise routine and maintained a strict diet, I would still struggle to regain that slim, sleek figure. My metabolism has changed, and certain areas of my body have been permanently altered. Genetics plays a role too, as the women in my family are naturally endowed with fuller breasts, hips, and thighs. I’ve stopped trying to fight against my genetic makeup.
Beyond my physical form, my mindset has evolved. Eating healthily and staying active genuinely makes me feel good. When I gain a few pounds or skip workouts, I notice a dip in my mood. It’s clear: I’m no longer pursuing the elusive perfect body; I’m striving for a healthy one.
I want to be able to chase after my kids (and grandkids!) without losing my breath. I want to reach for the lightbulb on a stool without worrying about straining my neck. I want to wake up energized and fill my days with the things I love and the people I cherish. I crave the stamina to enjoy all the blessings in my life and the strength to navigate the challenges that inevitably arise.
And for however long I’m fortunate enough to be on this earth, I want to feel good. I recognize that I cannot control everything that happens to my body. The other day, I sneezed and experienced a little leakage for the first time (yep, it’s time to add a ton of kegels to my routine). Menopause is on the horizon, bringing with it a host of potential health concerns.
So, I roll out my yoga mat several times a week and hit the pavement for a few miles whenever I can. I do my best to eat well (though I believe in indulging in chocolate and salty snacks occasionally). I engage in these practices not just to maintain a healthy weight but because this is the one body I have in my lifetime, and I want it to endure. I aim to thrive, not just survive, for the rest of my life.
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In summary, as I navigate through life, I’ve learned to embrace my body as it is, focusing on health and well-being rather than perfection. My journey reflects a shift in priorities, valuing strength and vitality over appearance.