Updated: Dec. 1, 2023
Originally Published: March 18, 2016
My 12-year-old son recently declared that he wanted to dye his hair bright blue. Instead of reacting with an emphatic “Absolutely not!”, I suggested a deep navy as a compromise. Thankfully, that color felt fresh enough compared to his previous “baby blue” phase, and he was on board.
My little boy is now a tween, which is pretty awesome—though tweens certainly present their share of challenges. But those challenges come with some surprisingly great outcomes.
1. Tweens can be messy because they prioritize what truly matters to them.
My son often neglects his personal hygiene, leaving his hair unkempt and his gym socks a bit too fragrant. Yet, he’s engrossed in gaming, writing his own comic series, and editing videos. He’s not concerned about impressing his classmates; he finds inspiration in his favorite characters.
2. Tweens may feel embarrassed by you, but they still crave your input.
My son often cringes at my attempts to connect—like when I dance to his music in the car or shout encouragement from the sidelines. However, when I praise his creativity in his latest story, he beams and says, “You’re the coolest mom ever.”
3. Tweens test boundaries as they seek independence.
My son often grumbles about school and procrastinates on his assignments, questioning the relevance of subjects like math (“When will I ever use this?”). Despite his resistance, he manages to maintain good grades, showcasing a wit and humor that are well beyond his years. He’s carving out his own path.
4. Tweens can be loud as they find their voices.
My son’s volume level has skyrocketed; he seems to express every thought at decibel levels meant for a rock concert. He blasts music that resonates deeply with him and uses it as an outlet for self-expression.
5. Tweens push back on rules because they need to feel free to explore.
My son often negotiates the household rules, experimenting with language in a playful (and sometimes eye-rolling) way. He’s even gotten creative in how he prefaces his occasional swearing, which makes me chuckle.
6. Tweens engage in quirky behavior as they navigate self-identity.
My son has taken to drawing doodles on his arms and wearing mismatched socks as a form of artistic expression. He’s unbothered by what others think; it brings him joy. Who knows what new trend will capture his attention next week?
7. Tweens don’t want to be coddled; they’re ready to take on responsibilities.
Whenever my husband and I reminisce about his childhood, he rolls his eyes and reminds us how grown-up he is now. But he surprises us by donating his allowance to local charities, showing he cares about others.
8. Tweens might act like they want space, but they still value your presence.
My son retreats to his room right after school, only to emerge for snacks and family dinners. Yet he still wants to catch the latest episode of his favorite show with me, proving that our bond remains strong.
Raising a tween brings a unique set of challenges and surprises daily. My husband and I are always on our toes, seeking the best ways to connect without triggering a “tween explosion.” Yes, tweens can be obstinate and dramatic, but at their core, they are just trying to figure out who they are.
Do they drive us up the wall? Absolutely. But in the grand scheme of things, they are truly remarkable—even in their most frustrating moments.
For more insights on parenting and navigating the complexities of family life, explore our other blog post on home insemination kit and check out Make a Mom for authoritative information on self insemination. You can also find valuable resources on news-medical related to pregnancy and home insemination.