Dear Little One,
From the very moment I sensed your presence, I became your first champion. It was a June morning, and as I woke up feeling tired and congested, a strange metallic taste lingered in my mouth, accompanied by an odd tightening in my belly. It was then that I realized you were on your way.
Later that day, a home pregnancy test confirmed what my heart already knew. The joy and protectiveness I felt for you were profound. As you grew within me, I experienced a wave of incredible firsts: hearing your heartbeat for the first time, feeling those little hiccups, and finally, the unmistakable kicks that could be seen from the outside.
Then came the monumental moments of labor—the first contractions, the first push, and your first breaths. I was there, witnessing it all. Each of your milestones became my own cherished memories.
Now that you’ve celebrated your first birthday, I find myself reflecting on our journey together. Though those firsts remain etched in my heart, I’ve come to realize that they are not just mine. They belong to you, to your dad, and to everyone who loves you.
In the early days, sharing you with others was a challenge. Whenever someone would hold you or play with you, I felt a wave of anxiety. Were they taking care of you in the “right” way? When you began spending days with Grandma while I returned to work, I worried about being replaced. While I was there for many of your firsts, I also missed some, and that was hard to accept.
Learning to share you has been my greatest act of love as a mom. It’s not always easy to balance the instinct to protect with the need to let you grow. But as I watch you explore and enjoy the company of those who love you, I realize that keeping my heart open allows you to experience so much more joy.
I will forever cherish our firsts—no one can take them away from me, and I wouldn’t want them to. I know that these early challenges are preparing me for many more firsts to come: your first day of school, facing challenges, making friends, and even the day you learn to drive.
Each passing day takes you further away from the time when all your firsts were intertwined with mine. I doubt it will ever be easy for me to fully accept that you’re not mine alone. But as you grow more independent, I know it will tug at my heartstrings.
For as long as you’ll let me, I will hold you close and share in your life. But for now, you are still my baby, both in spirit and in heart. You will always be my first little one, and your firsts will forever hold a special place within me.
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Summary
This heartfelt letter reflects on the journey of a mother and her firstborn, capturing the emotional complexities of sharing milestones and first experiences. As the child grows, the mother learns to embrace the joy of sharing their life while holding onto her cherished memories.