In a San Francisco neighborhood, some well-meaning but misguided individual decided to post signs urging parents to put their phones down and “be present.” Apparently, a quick glance at our devices is a major crime against parenting. It’s as if we’re expected to be laser-focused on our children at all times, without ever checking work emails or enjoying a moment of downtime. This kind of parent-shaming really needs to be addressed.
Radio station KFOG shared images of these signs spotted in Bernal Heights, and they certainly stir up some emotions. “BE PRESENT FOR OUR KIDS,” they shout in all caps, as if parents don’t already spend countless hours engaged with their little ones. Just because we occasionally check our phones or let the TV entertain them doesn’t mean we deserve to be guilted. In fact, I firmly believe that a little distraction can actually be beneficial.
Yes, I often find myself checking my phone, but I don’t owe anyone an explanation. I work from home, and my phone is a crucial part of that livelihood. When I’m on the playground, I’m not just scrolling mindlessly; I’m managing the very responsibilities that allow me to be present for my kids each day. And let’s face it, not all technology is bad. Sometimes, kids need a chance to explore and play without a hovering parent. Ignoring them for a little while to cook dinner or take a breather is perfectly okay. It might even help them learn to entertain themselves!
Parents don’t need condescending signs telling them how to spend their time. If someone wants to come over and engage my kids while I prepare a meal, they’re more than welcome. I’d love for them to come and be the perfect parent that I can’t always be because I have responsibilities to manage.
And even if a parent isn’t working, it’s really unfair for anyone to judge how they spend their time. If a mom wants to scroll through Instagram for a few moments, that’s her choice, and her kids will be just fine. Our parents distracted themselves with soap operas, magazines, and even the telephone long before smartphones came along. The methods may have changed, but the concept of distracted parenting is hardly new.
So, to any parent who sees these signs, I hope you roll your eyes and move on, or maybe even tear them down and throw them away where they belong.
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In summary, it’s important to recognize that a little distraction doesn’t make anyone a bad parent. Finding balance is key, and there’s no one right way to raise children.