Some parents seem to have everything under control. They arrive at school drop-off looking polished, with perfectly styled hair and a full face of makeup. They have showered, donned proper attire, and are ready for the day. They submit permission slips well in advance and send birthday cards with time to spare, just in case the mail is slow. They even manage to arrive five minutes early to every event.
And then there are those of us who find ourselves in a different boat.
Signs You Might Be a Procrastinator Parent
If you’re wondering whether you might be a procrastinator parent, here are some unmistakable signs:
- You wait until the gas light flickers on, then drive another 20 miles, running on fumes.
- Your car has actually run out of gas—more than once.
- You postpone vacation planning so long that when the time off arrives, you default to a staycation.
- Your hair is still damp at 5:30 p.m. when your partner comes home, because you only hopped in the shower at 5:25.
- Kids in your carpool know you as the mom who shows up in slippers and mutters at every red light.
- By the time you finally buy Valentine’s Day candy, the store shelves are stocked with Easter goodies.
- Your collection of belated birthday cards could fill a small drawer.
- You forget to mail the water bill until you find a pink “service discontinuation” notice on your front door.
- When you finally take down the holiday lights, they’re draped in fresh spring leaves, so you opt to leave them up for the next holiday season.
- By the time you catch up with fashion trends, they’ve turned retro.
- You tidy up for guests only when the doorbell rings, scrambling to shove items into the nearest closet.
- You do laundry after clothes have been worn twice and given a quick spritz of Febreze.
- You finish reading your book club selection after the discussion has already taken place.
- Arriving five minutes late feels like being right on time to you.
- Thanks to Amazon Prime, you order everything from birthday gifts to essential items about 30 minutes before you need them.
- You find yourself researching “best tweezers for rogue chin hairs” when you should be wrapping up a work project due tomorrow.
- Your daily exercise consists of a brisk five-block sprint to catch the commuter train.
- You schedule your annual gyno exam only after running out of birth control pills.
- Your library fines for overdue books surpass your latest credit card bill.
- Opening the fridge to discover just a half-empty jar of strawberry jam and some moldy cottage cheese is your cue to go grocery shopping.
- You celebrated your tenth wedding anniversary a full eleven years after tying the knot.
- By the time you think to set a date night, the only available reservation is at 5:15 for the early bird special—perfect, since you’ll both be asleep by 9:30 anyway.
If you’re one of those organized souls who seems to have it all together, we applaud you! We admire your skills. But for those of us who lean towards procrastination, don’t worry—you’re not alone. There are unexpected advantages to this approach! Just remember, oh no, look at the time! I’m late to pick up my kids from school!
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Summary
Being a procrastinator parent is often marked by amusing signs like waiting until the last moment to fill up on gas or rushing to finish tasks right before deadlines. While some parents seem to have everything organized, procrastinators have their own unique charm and camaraderie. Embracing this trait can offer a sense of solidarity among fellow procrastinators.