Why Our Sons Need Feminism and Feminism Needs Our Sons

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For those who might not realize, children represent our future, and if we want to foster meaningful change in our world, we must invest in their upbringing. The home is where children absorb lessons about language, social interactions, and gender roles. As a parent, it is my responsibility to set a positive example and instill values in my son. Recently, I came across a thought-provoking video discussing the mutual benefits of feminism for men and women alike.

Patriarchy affects every aspect of our society, negatively impacting not just women, but boys and men too. Change is impossible if only half of us are engaged in combating gender inequality. I commit to raising my voice against oppression, despite the challenges I face as a young woman of color. Feminism is essential for creating a world that benefits everyone—not just women. We must nurture our sons to become feminists who can drive meaningful change in the generations to come and debunk the myths surrounding feminism.

Here are some key reasons why I am choosing to raise my son as a feminist:

1. Feminism is for Everyone
   The negative perception of feminism needs to shift. Many assume it only advocates for women, but at its core, feminism promotes equal rights and opportunities for all genders. Denying this means you don’t believe everyone deserves equal opportunities, which is simply unacceptable. I never want my son to say, “I’m not a feminist because I’m a boy.” This lack of dialogue in media about what feminism truly represents is concerning. I want him to realize that identifying as a feminist is empowering, not diminishing. As a progressive leader once said, “If you believe in equality and respect, you should be a feminist.”
2. Emotions Are Natural
   Society often teaches boys to suppress their emotions, urging them to “man up” and “stay tough.” This expectation can lead to emotional repression, which has dire consequences; studies show that men account for 77.9% of suicides in the U.S. I believe this is linked to their reluctance to express vulnerability. When boys are told not to act “like a girl,” they internalize the notion that showing emotions is a weakness. I want my son to understand that it’s perfectly normal to express feelings. Everyone is human, and experiencing emotions is part of that humanity.
3. Understanding Consent and Abuse
   It’s crucial to instill in my son that he should never accept mistreatment from anyone. Men can also be victims of abuse, and the notion of rape culture is unacceptable. I will teach him the importance of consent—if someone says no, that’s final. Society often trivializes male experiences with sexual harassment, perpetuating dangerous stereotypes. We need to challenge this narrative and teach respect in all relationships. Rape culture stems from how we raise our boys; we must educate them to treat others respectfully as we also guide girls to be cautious.
4. Breaking Down Gender Stereotypes
   Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie wisely stated, “The problem with gender is that it prescribes how we should be rather than recognizing how we are.” Society imposes rigid expectations on what it means to be male or female. If my son wants to pursue a career in baking, dancing, or any other so-called feminine activity, he should feel free to do so without facing judgment. Color should not dictate identity; pink and blue have no inherent gender. I will encourage him to embrace his interests and be himself, free from societal constraints.

Ultimately, my goal is to raise a son who is confident, compassionate, and free to be who he truly is. I want him to understand that true empowerment comes from within and that he should never feel pressured to conform to societal ideals.

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In summary, raising our sons as feminists is crucial for fostering equality and respect in our society. By breaking down stereotypes and encouraging emotional expression, we can cultivate a future generation that values compassion and understanding.