Last night was a true test of endurance in parenting. With my partner away, our regular nanny’s schedule had shifted, leaving us without help. My in-laws were unable to come over in time, and my trusted friend was caught up at an event. There I was, left to manage three kids while suffering from the worst migraine I’ve experienced in years. The last time I found myself in such a predicament, our former nanny had graciously changed her plans to help tuck the kids in when I could barely muster the energy to move.
Now, however, my beloved nanny had relocated to North Dakota (just to clarify, that’s my former nanny, not my husband), and here I was, battling a relentless pain that radiated from my left eye to the back of my neck, feeling nauseous and overwhelmed. I couldn’t help but be grateful that I had prepped dinner ahead of time.
As I plated their food, I curled up on the couch, giving instructions to my little 5-year-old helpers. “Is your baby sister done with her food? Can you get her some fruit? Please make sure she doesn’t stand up in her high chair or stick her fork in her nose?” It was a struggle to keep my thoughts coherent through the pounding in my head.
Earlier, I had felt quite the domestic superstar for creating cute fruit skewers, but now I regretted that decision as I imagined my 21-month-old attempting to use one as a weapon. Luckily, my attentive son was there to help, carefully removing the fruit from the skewer for his sister.
As the clock struck 5 PM, despair began to set in. I wondered how I would manage to get my kids bathed, teeth brushed, and ready for bed. The noise from my lively 5-year-olds felt deafening, each laugh a sharp jab to my throbbing head. My little girl, with her big brown eyes, kept calling out, “Mama, Mama,” and I struggled to muster the energy to respond.
Finally, my 5-year-olds announced that their sister had finished her meal. I took a deep breath, mustered my last ounce of strength, and prepared to clean her up. To my dismay, I discovered she had stuffed a corn kernel up her nose. Had she ever done that before? No. Did I have the energy to deal with it? No. Armed with tweezers, I managed to remove the offending object, only to find another kernel jammed even deeper. Thank goodness for my impressive (yet entirely unrecognized) skills at foreign object removal from toddler nostrils!
After a brief lecture on the dangers of food exploration, I decided to forego the usual bedtime routine. My little one was tucked in around 6:15 PM—an hour earlier than usual, but I simply couldn’t push through another hour. I called for my 5-year-olds to join me in my bedroom for a much-needed break from the chaos. “Tonight is a bath and tooth-brushing holiday!” I declared. They snuggled in, indulging in cartoons while I desperately tried to rest under the covers, making occasional trips to the bathroom to expel my stomach contents.
In a historic first, I asked my kids to tuck themselves in. They took it in stride; my son gave me a hug and turned off the lights, ensuring his sister kept quiet as they settled down. With their doors finally closed, a wave of silence washed over me. I felt immense gratitude that the day was over and for the wonderful kids I had.
The pain eventually subsided, and I returned to my normal self. I recalled a colleague once stating that a sick child shouldn’t be an excuse for missing work, implying everyone should have a backup plan. But not everyone is blessed with a strong support system. While I occasionally find myself in these challenging situations, they are thankfully rare.
To all the parents out there without a village—your resilience is inspiring! Whatever your family looks like, if your kids are fed, occasionally bathed, and their teeth are brushed most of the time, then you are doing an incredible job.
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Summary
Parenting can be incredibly challenging, especially on days when help is unavailable. A mother recounts a particularly difficult night managing three children while suffering from a severe migraine. Despite the chaos, she finds humor and gratitude in her children’s resilience and support. This experience highlights the importance of community and the strength of parents who navigate these hurdles on their own.