Feeling like a subpar parent? Just pick up an article or study on sleep advice, and you’re bound to feel overwhelmed. Recently, I stumbled upon a popular piece discussing the importance of early bedtimes for children. The author backed up their claims with studies and personal anecdotes, insisting that a strict bedtime of 7:30 p.m. is key to happier, smarter, and healthier kids.
Immediately, I felt a wave of self-doubt wash over me. My kids are always night owls, and our bedtime routine usually starts around 8 p.m., dragging on until they finally drift off around 9 or even 9:30. But then I paused; my children are thriving—smart, healthy, and generally well-behaved. Sure, they have their moments of being kids, but aren’t we all a little tired sometimes?
What if they’re just getting the sleep they need, albeit on a different schedule? It’s entirely possible that some kids are simply wired to be “late to bed, late to rise.” I’ve tried to enforce earlier bedtimes, initiating the routine at 7 p.m. with military precision, but as soon as the lights dim, I’m met with a flood of questions. “Mom, why does the sun shine?” “Mom, what happens to my friends if they stop playing with me?” “Mom, what’s it like when you die?”
These are profound questions—not something I can brush off. While I’m not about to give a lecture on astronomy or existentialism, I cherish these conversations, even if they push bedtime further into the night.
And let’s be honest, starting the bedtime routine earlier just wouldn’t fit into our family’s schedule. My older child comes home from school around 3 p.m., and after unwinding with a snack and some screen time, it’s dinner, homework, and, of course, Daddy’s return. Family time before bed is essential for us; my husband plays an integral role in our children’s bedtime ritual. If he’s late, the kids struggle to fall asleep without him, which might be seen as a bad habit by some.
Maybe our approach is unconventional; we do allow them to stay up later and even lie down with them until they’re asleep if needed. Oops, I must have violated some unwritten sleep code!
Ultimately, every family must find what works for them. If early bedtimes are your thing, that’s fantastic! But if you’re navigating the world with a couple of night owls like mine, know you’re not alone. After all, theories are just that—hypotheses that may change with new research.
In the realm of parenting, especially when it comes to sleep, it’s essential to do what fits your family best. Anything else can just add unnecessary stress.
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In summary, early bedtimes may not suit every family, and that’s okay. Each child is unique, and it’s crucial to embrace what works for you.