Dear Mom of a Child with Unique Needs,
I want to share a bit of my journey with you. I live with both depression and anxiety, and I prefer when people describe me as a “person with depression” instead of labeling me as a “depressed person.” I believe that person-first language is essential, and I strive to apply this when referring to your child as well. However, I often find myself unsure about the right words to use. Is it better to say “disability” or “condition”? What about “sick”? I genuinely want to be respectful and sensitive, and I hope to communicate my kindness and sincerity to you.
While I don’t feel the need to label your child, I would love for our children to form a friendship. It’s important for my kids to understand and appreciate the diversity that exists in our world. Friendships should blossom naturally, and I want them to connect without any sense of tokenism.
I also find myself at a loss for how to discuss your child with my own. I’d appreciate any guidance you can provide. I want to be mindful of your child’s privacy and avoid sharing details that might be uncomfortable. For instance, if my child notices something different about yours—like a visible aid—I’d rather not delve into specifics that could be intrusive. I want him to be curious but respectful, and your input would be invaluable here.
I genuinely hope we can connect more. I can only imagine how isolating it might feel to be a mom navigating the world with a child who has special needs. You likely face many challenges, from societal misunderstandings to scheduling conflicts due to medical appointments. It must feel overwhelming at times. I’m here to listen if you’d like to share, or if you prefer a break from medical talk, I’m completely fine with that too. Let’s chat and see how we can support each other.
I promise that when we meet in public, I will treat your child with the respect and dignity they deserve. If my kids have questions, I’ll do my best to answer them, and they’ll know they can approach you directly for anything I can’t explain. I’d love for our kids to have the opportunity to make new friends together, as my children genuinely enjoy meeting others.
Lastly, I have just one question—can your child join us at our Lego table? If that doesn’t work, we can always find another way to play together.
Thank you for taking the time to read this. I know how precious your time is.
Warm regards,
A Fellow Mama