Humans of New York (HONY) is renowned for capturing the essence of life through heartfelt stories and snapshots from the bustling streets of New York City. Their recent post highlights a critical lesson about consent that every child should be taught.
In a poignant photo shared by HONY, a young woman recounted her first experience with intimacy, revealing a distressing reality about how we fail to educate young people on the importance of consent. “It was the summer between 8th and 9th grade,” she began. “We were friends who made out. Sometimes he’d chat with me, and other times, he wouldn’t.”
One evening, while hanging out in his basement and drinking, he pressured her to engage in sexual activity. “I was terrified and kept saying: ‘maybe,’” she shared. Then he suggested flipping a coin to decide. “My stomach sank.” The outcome of that coin toss was not what anyone should want to rely on for such a significant moment.
Afterward, she reflected on the experience in her journal, writing repeatedly in purple marker, “It didn’t happen.” For years, she felt guilty for her emotions, believing she was being overly sensitive. It took her five long years to understand that consent is never a gamble.
This story resonates with many, echoing the blurred lines and discomfort that often accompany young people’s sexual experiences. Many of us, myself included, have faced similar situations where we felt compelled to go along with something we weren’t ready for, often due to a desire for acceptance.
A recent study by Fusion revealed some troubling statistics: 75% of 48 men aged 18-49 had never heard the term “consent” until they reached college, highlighting a significant gap in education. It’s crucial to understand that a lack of a “no” does not automatically equate to a “yes.”
While it’s uncomfortable for parents to consider their children entering the world of dating, it’s essential to prepare them for healthy and consensual experiences. Both parties must know their rights to say yes or no, and they must recognize that consent requires an enthusiastic “yes” from everyone involved.
Too many individuals carry similar stories, but we can change this narrative. We have the responsibility to educate the next generation—both girls and boys—about the clear message that consent must be a definite “yes,” every single time.
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In summary, we must prioritize teaching children about consent to foster a culture of respect and understanding. By equipping our kids with this knowledge, we pave the way for healthier relationships and a more empathetic society.
