I’m the mom on Facebook that many people love to roll their eyes at. Yes, I’m an oversharer, and it’s gotten me into a bit of hot water. Here’s what I’m about:
- I’m the mom who rallies behind fellow breastfeeding moms when they seek support.
- I’m the mom with both kids in cloth diapers.
- I’m the mom who co-sleeps with my little ones.
- I’m the mom growing organic veggies to feed my toddler and make homemade baby food for my baby.
- I’m the mom you see in the grocery store with a baby in an ergonomic carrier.
- I’m the mom pushing a grocery cart filled with wholesome, organic snacks for my kids.
- I’m the mom sharing my stories about natural childbirth and those speedy labors on social media.
- I’m the mom who bounces back to her pre-baby weight within weeks of delivery, with no stretch marks to show for it.
- I’m the mom who constantly shares photos of my workout sessions with my kids.
- I’m the mom who openly expresses gratitude to God for my many blessings, especially my family.
I seem to embody the stereotype of the “hippie-crunchy-granola” mom, and I’ve faced accusations of mom-shaming simply for living my truth. Yes, I’m the mom that some love to criticize. You grimace at my posts. You judge me as I walk by. You vent to your mom friends about me. I see those passive-aggressive Facebook statuses; I’m not oblivious.
Here’s the kicker: While you’re busy judging my choices, you seem to forget that you, too, are navigating motherhood and making tough decisions to cater to your family’s needs. You’re likely facing your own critics as well.
If only you could share your perspective… Luckily, I can:
- Now that I have a little one who breastfeeds well, I support other moms seeking breastfeeding help. I don’t shame anyone for using formula; my son was formula-fed for much of his first year. My daughter, however, is an excellent breastfeeder, though we’ve faced challenges like mastitis and thrush. I push through because, frankly, buying formula for two close-in-age babies isn’t in our budget. Many other moms face similar situations, so I extend a helping hand when they ask.
- Why cloth diapers? Let’s be real—have you covered my Target bill for a month’s worth of diapers for two kids? No? Well, now you know why I go for cloth.
- Co-sleeping? While research may say otherwise, I’ve come to embrace it. We didn’t set out this way; I have cribs and bassinets as proof. But when you return to work just six weeks after your first child is born—a child who struggles to sleep—you do what you must for your sanity. My kids are safe, and we all get decent sleep most nights.
- I grow my own food because I have the space, it’s economical, and it’s convenient. I can stroll into my backyard for tomatoes or salad greens, significantly reducing our grocery bills. Plus, it’s reassuring to know my food is free of chemicals. Yes, I get scoffed at for having a garden.
- I’m into babywearing, using a pricey ergonomic carrier because it’s comfortable. I’ve tried cheaper options that hurt my back. It’s a practical solution for juggling two little ones while out and about, not just for bonding.
- You’ll see a lot of healthy items in my grocery cart because I’m trying to protect my family from diseases like heart disease and diabetes. I’ve seen loved ones suffer from these conditions, so I aim to prevent them. But let’s be real: we also have bakery cookies and frozen pizza for those busy nights; we all do our best.
- I’ve experienced both an epidural-assisted labor and a fast, natural delivery. Both methods worked for me, and I’m proud of my natural birth experience. But let’s not forget—the bravest thing I did was getting that epidural during a painful contraction because I needed it.
- As for my quick postpartum weight loss and lack of stretch marks? It’s genetics, plain and simple. I don’t judge moms with stretch marks, and you shouldn’t judge me for not having them.
- I actively pursue fitness and a healthy lifestyle because there’s a history of illness in my family. I’ve battled health issues, including postpartum depression, and maintaining a healthy lifestyle has helped me reclaim my joy. I share my journey in hopes that it might inspire another mom out there.
- Finally, yes, I openly express gratitude for my blessings using hashtags like #soblessed. I share because I’ve learned to appreciate the little things, and it’s my way of connecting with God. I understand some may see it as humblebragging, but it’s just my way of thanking the universe for my children, the food on our table, and the ability to provide for my family.
Perhaps if we took the time to understand the reasons behind each other’s choices, we wouldn’t be so quick to judge one another. But let’s be honest—that change is unlikely. So, I’ll continue doing what works for my family and sharing it with the world. And if your approach differs from mine, I’m sure you have your own valid reasons. I bet you’re also a Facebook mom that others love to criticize.
In summary, motherhood is a journey filled with unique choices, and it’s essential to support each other rather than cast judgment. Whether you’re co-sleeping, using cloth diapers, or choosing a different path altogether, we’re all just trying to do our best.
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