When my daughter, Lily, came into my life, it felt like I was reliving my own childhood. From the start, I noticed our uncanny similarities, like our mutual love for the color pink. She’s inherited my nose and my stubborn streak, while her humor often leaves me in stitches. Each day feels like a nostalgic journey as I watch her grow. We’ve cherished moments with my favorite childhood books, enjoyed dress-up sessions in my closet, and hosted countless tea parties on rainy days. But now that she’s on the cusp of her teenage years, I’ve come to realize that there are some significant aspects of being a teenage girl that I’d either forgotten or blocked out. Surprisingly, she’s not all that different from the girl I was back in my acid-washed jeans and oversized hair.
1. Teenage Girls Spend an Absurd Amount of Time in the Bathroom.
At 12, I remember my brothers banging on the bathroom door, threatening all sorts of mischief while I took my time in the shower. I was deep conditioning and styling my hair with a ton of hairspray. I had completely forgotten about those bathroom standoffs until I caught my son, Ethan, sitting outside the bathroom door with a book. When I asked what he was doing, he sighed and said, “I stopped banging on the door ten minutes ago. She’ll come out eventually.” I wish my brothers had that kind of patience.
2. Teenage Girls Need Guidance on Shaving.
After years of managing my hair situation, I overlooked the fact that shaving is a skill learned with time. Recently, I noticed Lily had some underarm hair, so I gently suggested she give shaving a try. Her eyes went wide with panic as she exclaimed, “You mean with a razor? I can’t even use a knife by myself!” I recalled my own awkward attempts at shaving, balancing on the bathtub and nicking myself while my mom offered advice. I hope Ethan is starting to understand why I took so long in the bathroom!
3. Teenage Girls Never Stop Talking.
As a teen, I could chat with friends for hours, and while I can’t recall the specifics, I’m sure they were crucial discussions. My parents even got a second phone line just in case they needed to call for help! While I had a pink princess phone, Lily connects with her friends over FaceTime for hours, discussing everything from outfits to school gossip. She talks to me and her dad incessantly, and I can only imagine my mother chuckling at the similarities.
4. Teenage Girls Are Anxious About Their Periods.
I remember reading Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret and feeling terrified about my first period. The thought of bleeding, ruining clothes, and having boys find out sent me into a tailspin. Lily shares those fears, convinced she might bleed to death when her time comes. One day, when she asked about tampons, I was taken aback by her confusion, thinking they were teepees. After a rather circular discussion that ended with her in tears, I realized her mistake. She was relieved to discover she didn’t have to deal with Native American housing!
5. Teenage Girls Cry Over the Smallest Things.
Watching Lily get emotional over a pesky shoelace brings back waves of my own teen angst. The tears, the feeling of injustice, and the all-consuming rage when things don’t go her way are all too familiar. When she storms off to her room, slamming the door, I can’t help but remember how patient my own mother was during my dramatic episodes.
These reflections are just the beginning. As Lily navigates her teenage years, I know I’ll be reminded of my own experiences — from first crushes to the struggle of parallel parking. Watching her blossom into a young woman is a joy, and I can’t help but feel that she’s becoming one of my closest friends. Just don’t tell her that; she’d roll her eyes for sure.
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Summary
As my daughter approaches her teenage years, I’ve reflected on the common experiences we share. From bathroom battles to the nuances of shaving, teenage girls have their unique challenges that I had forgotten. These memories remind me of my own teenage struggles and the importance of being there for Lily as she grows.