As a photographer, my work revolves around capturing moments through various lenses. Each lens offers a unique view—some broaden my perspective, while others draw in closely to capture the intricate details of faces and emotions. I have my go-to lenses for everyday shots, and some that intentionally distort reality for artistic effect.
This constant shifting of lenses mirrors our daily lives as mothers. We switch between different viewpoints—joyful lenses, cynical lenses, and even those that obscure the truth of our experiences.
A dear friend of mine recently shared her struggles with her three boys, all of whom have been notoriously poor sleepers. For five years, her own sleep has been elusive. Her youngest, a sweet little guy named Max, fights sleep just like his siblings, often staying awake far past bedtime.
In one of her posts, she shared a heartwarming picture of Max asleep on her lap with the caption, “Mom fail – 33,425,000.” Yet, she is not a failure at all. This woman, whom I’ve known for over twenty years, pours her heart and soul into motherhood. They’ve tried everything from sleep training to various remedies, but the sleepless nights persist.
This sense of failure stems from the lens she is currently viewing her situation through—a lens clouded by exhaustion. When we are perpetually tired, it can feel as though we are looking through a blinding spotlight that obscures everything else. It’s easy to fixate on the flaws and shortcomings, missing the beauty that surrounds us.
Weight, diet, finances, relationships—these are all lenses that influence how we perceive our lives. Yet, not every lens reveals beauty; some magnify our imperfections.
To all the exhausted moms out there, I hope you have a supportive community to lean on during tough times. If you’re in pain, I wish for friends who can help you heal. And when you find joy, may those around you celebrate with you, refraining from tarnishing your happiness with their own struggles.
If support is hard to come by, remember that your current lens might be stuck in a negative view. It doesn’t mean your reality is as bleak as it seems.
To my wonderful friend, you are an incredible mother. Your husband cherishes you, your boys adore you, and I see you through a lens that reveals your true worth—not as a failure, but as a loving and devoted mom.
This article was originally published on Aug. 22, 2016. For more insights on home insemination and related topics, check out this informative resource about the IVF process, or explore Cryobaby’s home insemination kits for additional support in your journey. For our terms and conditions, visit here.
Summary:
Motherhood is a journey filled with various perspectives, shaped by our experiences, challenges, and emotions. Through the lens of exhaustion, it’s easy to feel like a failure, but it’s crucial to remember that our view can be distorted. Support, healing, and joy can help us shift our focus to the beauty that exists within our lives.