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Why We Worry: The Parent’s Perspective
In just an instant, everything can change—that’s the root of our worries as parents. We invest in vehicles with top safety ratings and spend countless hours researching car seats, checking the Insurance Institute for Highway Safety rankings. We cushion sharp corners on furniture and secure cabinets filled with cleaning products. We lay our little ones down to sleep on their backs and remove crib bumpers for their safety.
We install baby gates, hold their hands as they navigate rocky paths, and equip them with bike helmets, knee pads, and elbow pads. We choose homes in family-friendly neighborhoods with highly-rated schools, even if it stretches our budget. We opt for organic milk and all-natural snacks and ensure they receive their vaccinations and flu shots.
We teach them to look both ways before crossing the street and make it a priority to meet their friends’ parents before approving playdates. We provide cell phones for easy communication, so they can reach us whenever they need support—and vice versa.
As we discuss peer pressure, we find ourselves spending weekends in empty parking lots, surrounded only by orange cones, fighting the urge to close our eyes in the passenger seat, too fearful to relinquish control. We clarify curfews and expect them to be where they say they’ll be. We encourage them to stay home, but we also have discussions about drugs, consent, and the importance of being vigilant with their drinks. We prepare them with the number of a reliable cab service, reminding them that they can always call us, no matter the hour.
When they move into college dorms, we wish we could have met their roommates’ parents too. Driving home alone, we reflect on a time when our homes were filled with baby gates and bikes in the garage. And then, there are those unsettling moments—when the doorbell rings late at night, and we learn that the car we thought was safe couldn’t shield our child from a drunk driver; or a call from school about an accident, urging us to get to the hospital quickly; or the unbearable moment when we witness them choking, powerless to help. Sometimes, they stop breathing without any warning.
We are painfully aware that it only takes a heartbeat for everything to shift. Despite all the precautions—helmets, pads, cell phones, doctor visits, and open dialogues—we understand that we ultimately lack control over the outcome of our children’s lives. That’s precisely why we worry. It’s a concern that will linger in our hearts forever.
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In summary, our worries as parents stem from the knowledge that safety can be fleeting. Despite our best efforts to protect our children, we often feel a lack of control over their well-being. Our love and concern drive us to prepare and educate, but ultimately, we must accept that life can change in an instant.