By: Ava Thompson
My family recently enjoyed a road trip to our cabin in upstate New York. In the early days, when my kids were infants, this journey felt like a monumental challenge. What should have been a four-hour drive often stretched into an all-day adventure, filled with constant stops for nursing and diaper changes. To top it off, both of my little ones were notorious for screaming in the car, resulting in frequent breaks to comfort them.
I can still picture those tiny faces red and blotchy from tears, their fists shaking in frustration as they tried to escape their car seats. It was a tough time for all of us, and I’m genuinely relieved that phase has passed.
As we were driving back from our trip, we made a quick stop at a rest area for a caffeine fix. My husband and kids stayed in the car, happily glued to their screens, while I braved the long line for coffee. Behind me, a father was bouncing his fussy baby on his knee, trying to keep him entertained.
The baby tugged at my hair, and I couldn’t help but chuckle. “Sorry,” the dad said, looking a bit flustered. “He’s just really cranky today.” I assured him it was no big deal and found the whole situation quite cute. I asked why the baby was so upset, and he replied, “Oh, he just really hates the car.”
I shared that my kids had the same aversion during their babyhood, which seemed to alleviate some of his stress. Then he mused, “But I’ll miss it, right?” I laughed and replied, “You might miss some of it, but definitely not the car crying!”
As we reached the front of the line waiting for our drinks, the little one was crying again, tears rolling down his chubby cheeks. The dad, slightly embarrassed, began bouncing him more vigorously. I overheard him repeating, “But I’ll miss it, right?”
I understood his sentiment, and if it brought him comfort, all the power to him. However, I often wish this phrase didn’t exist. When I became a new mom, I frequently heard, “You’ll miss this time” whenever I expressed my frustrations about sleepless nights and the overwhelming demands of motherhood. It wasn’t particularly helpful; instead, it made me feel pressured to enjoy every single moment without question.
Sure, I miss parts of my children’s infancy with a pang in my heart, but the tough times? I certainly don’t miss those. During those challenging moments, I just needed a space to vent, a chance to be honest about how hard it was. When people said, “You’ll miss it,” it invalidated my feelings and made me feel ungrateful for having a few complaints.
So to that dad at the rest stop with the wailing baby, and to all new parents out there: it’s completely okay to vent. You don’t have to cherish every second. Some moments are undeniably tough. Getting thrown up on at 3 a.m.? Not fun. Sleeping in one-hour increments for months on end? Absolutely horrible. Carrying a colicky baby for hours each night? Pure torture.
Feel free to express your frustrations — no need to apologize. We all know you love your kids more than anything. We know you’re creating countless beautiful memories with them, moments you wish could last forever. But it’s perfectly normal to acknowledge that certain aspects of parenting can be downright awful.
I doubt you’ll miss the sleepless nights, the projectile vomit, or the constant crying. You’re not supposed to love those parts. What makes you remarkable, though — and perhaps what those hardships are ultimately for — is that you persevere. You push through all of it because your love for your children is boundless.
Essentially, you’re a rockstar, a superhero, and a miracle worker. All parents are. So relish the joyful moments, vent about the tough stuff, and keep moving forward. And remember, you’re not alone in this journey. We’ve all been through it, and we all deserve a little reward for our efforts — perhaps a refreshing iced mocha Frappuccino?
If you’re interested in learning more about home insemination, check out our post on intracervical insemination. For further insights, you might want to visit Healthline for valuable information on pregnancy. If you’re considering self insemination, Make a Mom offers authoritative guidance on home insemination kits.
In summary, it’s okay to recognize the difficulties of parenting while cherishing the good moments. You’re not alone, and it’s perfectly acceptable to vent about the less glamorous parts of raising children.