It has been eight years since a team of specialists diagnosed my eldest child with sensory processing disorder (SPD). Prior to that evaluation, I had never encountered SPD or even heard of it. My family life at that time was nothing short of chaotic. Most evenings, I would collapse into bed feeling utterly drained and defeated, grappling with a sense of hopelessness. Today, our lives have transformed dramatically. My eldest child has progressed from severe SPD with considerable speech delays to being a typical fifth grader who loves to chat—my younger child loves to remind me that he is making up for those four silent years! My youngest was also diagnosed with SPD at 18 months, but today, he shows no symptoms.
Over the past six years, I’ve connected with countless families worldwide through my nonprofit, SPD Parent Zone. Many of these families are just beginning their journeys and sharing the same feelings of hopelessness I once experienced. I started SPD Parent Zone to ease their path and provide answers and hope. Here are the lessons I’ve learned along the way that I share with other parents:
- Have Faith in Your Child.
Every child needs at least one person who believes in them. I always thought if I didn’t believe in my kids, then who would? It can be tough to maintain that belief, especially when things seem dire. Focus on believing in their diagnosis, not their prognosis. They are more than labels. When you believe, you start taking action, and that can lead to remarkable changes. - Trust Yourself.
Always rely on your intuition. You often know when something feels off about your child, even if others, including professionals, may disagree. Remember, you are the expert on your child. Trust that knowledge and act on it; the sooner, the better. - Form a Supportive Community.
The saying, “it takes a village to raise a child” holds true. Finding that village can be challenging, but it’s essential. It took us a few years to discover the right school and support team for our children, and once we did, they began to flourish. Seek out others who understand your journey—you’re not alone in this! - Persevere.
There were days when it felt like my kids made two steps forward and ten steps back. It was frustrating, and I often felt like giving up. However, regression is part of the journey. Focus on your progress, no matter how small, because those incremental changes can lead to significant improvements over time. - Educate Yourself.
Knowledge is powerful. Dedicating time to research SPD can help you understand your child better and assist them effectively. I spent countless nights exploring SPD through articles and books, and it was overwhelming at first. Talk to experts—therapists, teachers, and other parents—who have navigated similar paths. - Prioritize Self-Care.
Taking care of yourself is crucial, yet it can feel selfish. Parenting a child with special needs can be draining. Carving out time for yourself allows you to recharge and be present for your family. Remember, self-care is not a luxury; it’s a necessity. - Engage in Their Interests.
One of the most valuable lessons I learned was to immerse myself in my child’s world. My younger child would mimic her brother while he spun around, creating joyful moments that built trust and connection. Engaging with their activities can encourage them to feel safe in their surroundings. - View the World Through Their Perspective.
Understanding your child’s experiences can foster patience and empathy. I once struggled to grasp why my son was such a picky eater or why he screamed during haircuts. Learning about SPD helped me see things from his viewpoint, which created more understanding between us. - Ignore the Critics.
Many parents encounter unsolicited advice, often from well-meaning family and friends. It’s challenging, especially when it comes from those close to you. Remember to trust yourself and your child, and seek guidance from professionals who truly understand SPD. - Practice Gratitude.
Focus on what you have rather than what you lack. Whatever you give attention to grows; concentrate on the positive aspects of your life and watch them expand. There’s always something to be grateful for, even in tough times.
Bonus Insight: Hope Exists!
Initially, every professional we saw described my son’s condition as one of the most severe cases. He faced challenges that left me terrified for his future. Fast forward eight years—he’s now thriving in school, playing sports, and has formed wonderful friendships. My hopes for him have evolved dramatically. I share this not to boast, but to illustrate that positive change is possible. If we can navigate this journey, so can you!
Remember, motherhood is about embracing and celebrating your child for who they are. It can transform you into the person you are meant to be.
For more information on sensory awareness, consider visiting STAR Institute for SPD.