“Are we having turkey sandwiches again?” my little one asks, his bright green eyes twinkling with mischief as he looks up at me. “What the heck?”
I cringe and remind him once more that such language isn’t suitable for a 3-year-old. Yes, he heard it from his dad. Yes, adults sometimes let a few choice words slip. And yes, my partner and I could do a better job of keeping our language clean.
This discussion has become an ongoing, exhausting ritual. I never imagined I would be one of those parents who monitors every word. Yet here I am, a 40-something mom, carefully choosing my phrasing to prevent my son from shouting inappropriate words during show and tell—like the time I exclaimed something a bit too colorful when a frozen chicken fell on my foot.
And it escalates. Think being called a “silly goose” is bad? Just wait until your toddler drops a “butthead” in conversation. You may find yourself wanting to look up Shakespearean insults for a bit of relief; I’d gladly prefer being called a “dried neat’s tongue” over that any day.
Every car ride has turned into a vocabulary quiz. “Is ‘gosh’ a bad word? What about ‘darn’?” Is he earning extra points for creativity with “darn gosh”?
The issue becomes complex, especially since I’m a writer and believe that words don’t carry inherent goodness or badness; they merely express our thoughts. Some of history’s greatest authors, like Ernest Hemingway and Virginia Woolf, made use of vivid language. I’m not thrilled about censoring my child or assigning moral values to certain words.
But societal expectations loom large. When my toddler swears in public, it feels like he’s waving a flag that reads, “My mom is a terrible parent, raising me to be a delinquent!”
Some phrases are even trickier. “Is ‘Oh my God’ a bad word?” my son asks, genuinely perplexed.
I find myself stumped. In our mixed-faith family, religion isn’t a focal point, and we haven’t quite figured out how to navigate these discussions. My son likely has no idea who Jesus is, let alone what it means to be irreverent. “No, it’s not inappropriate,” I say, hesitating. “It’s just… not something to say casually.”
“But you and Dad say it all the time.” He’s not wrong, and I’m left grappling with the inconsistency of our expectations. Where do we draw the line? Is “What the heck?” offensive? Will I invoke the wrath of the neighborhood moms if I say “gosh darn it”?
And then there’s the issue of hypocrisy. Society frowns on a 3-year-old saying “Oh my God!” over spilled paint, yet many adults who attend church sporadically are just as guilty of irreverence. Hypocrisy is probably a concept my son is too young to grasp.
So, I try my best to guide him toward using “friendly” language, despite the occasional absurdity of my explanations, especially when surrounded by adults whose language could make a sailor blush. I encourage him to use respectful words, think about his manners, and always follow the Golden Rule.
And if he does slip up, well, you have my sincerest apologies.
For more insights into parenting and family life, check out this excellent resource on pregnancy and the Home Insemination Kit for those considering their own family journey. You can also find more related content on our other blog to keep you engaged.
In summary, navigating the world of toddler vocabulary can be a challenge, especially when considering societal norms and personal values. As I strive to instill good language habits while battling the occasional slip-up, I can only hope my efforts will pay off in the long run.