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Nobody Tells Me How to Vote, Especially My Partner
The atmosphere in the room was electric, filled with chatter about the upcoming elections. Makeshift tables were arranged in the storage area, transforming it into a bustling phone bank. Voices mingled together like a chorus, each person chiming in at different moments. The scent of pepperoni and sausage wafted through the air, with greasy boxes stacked nearby serving as sustenance for the dedicated volunteers. In between calls, campaign staffers shared stories of their encounters with voters, each trying to outdo the last. I had a script beside my phone, ready with responses for questions concerning healthcare, education, and job creation. But I was caught off guard by a recurring theme in my conversations that left me baffled.
“My partner tells me how to vote.”
I initially thought women might find it harder to utter this to another woman, yet I heard the same nonchalant admission time and again.
“My partner tells me how to vote.”
These women didn’t share any distinctive traits; their only commonality was the choice to cede their voting rights to their partners. It was shocking how easily they allowed someone else to dictate their political beliefs and priorities.
Reflecting on these exchanges, I wish I had taken the time to delve deeper into their reasons for relinquishing their voting rights. Instead, I merely acknowledged their comments, thanked them for their time, and moved to the next call. My own upbringing was steeped in political discussions; my mother took me to the polls and encouraged open conversations about our beliefs. I strive to instill the same values in my children, teaching them to grasp the significance of issues affecting our family and community. Thus, it was difficult for me to comprehend how pivotal decisions could be handed off to their partners as if they held no weight.
Voting is a privilege forged through the sacrifices of countless individuals, often marked by struggle and advocacy. It belongs to ME.
As you navigate your own political choices this election season, remember the women who fought for your right to cast a ballot.
Though it shouldn’t be necessary, perhaps we should wear bracelets saying, “What Would Susan B. Anthony Do?” She was a trailblazer in the suffragist movement, tirelessly advocating for women’s voting rights. You might recognize her image on the dollar coin; she was even arrested for attempting to vote!
On and before election day, we need to honor those who believed in our right to have our voices heard and our own political identities. We should not allow our partners—or anyone else—to dictate how we vote.
It’s our right and duty to engage with the issues, conduct our own research, and determine our stances on matters that are important to us. It’s our right and responsibility to share our voices and discuss the elections. Ultimately, it’s our right to vote.
On election day, we returned home after a long day, loaded into the car, and set off to the polling station. My partner and I each received our own ballots, standing in our respective booths, shielded from one another’s choices. Our children wandered between us, and my daughter, tall enough to peek over the booth, exclaimed, “Dad voted for that one, Mom.”
I met her gaze and said firmly, “This is Mommy’s vote. Mommy decides who she votes for today.” (That’s exactly what Susan B. Anthony would have done.)
This article was initially published on October 10, 2023.
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Summary:
In a reflective piece, Emma Cartwright discusses the importance of voting as an individual right, sharing her experiences of encountering women who defer their voting choices to their partners. She emphasizes the historical struggles women faced to secure their voting rights and encourages all to embrace their political identities and responsibilities.