This summer, I dropped off my son at my father’s house for his yearly visit. While we were chatting, my father glanced around his yard and said, “I’m just glad your son is here to help me tidy up this place. It would be nice if it looked like a decent neighborhood.” He chuckled, and my son laughed along, likely unsure of what his grandpa meant.
I, however, didn’t find it funny at all. Growing up, I was exposed to similar comments that I once brushed off, thinking they were harmless jokes. My father was raised in the South, in a conservative household that held onto outdated beliefs. While I had always avoided using such language, I never truly recognized its harmful impact until I became a parent myself.
Hearing my father’s comments ignited a fierce anger within me. I realized I wouldn’t want my children to ever hear such sentiments. I can’t shield them from all the negativity in the world, but I can certainly speak up when I hear it, even if it’s coming from my big, intimidating dad who thinks he’s just being funny. He dismisses these remarks as “just words,” failing to see the harm they cause.
These words wound not only those they target but also those who hear them. They affect our future generations, and we must aim to raise them to be more compassionate and accepting than those before them. We have to break this relentless cycle that has persisted through generations, a cycle that breeds fear and pain, costing so many lives.
Typically, I hesitate to confront my father, but that day, I realized my silence had enabled his behavior. I gathered my courage and said, “Dad, please don’t speak like that in front of my son. He hears you.” My father, towering over me, paused and looked down. “I was just trying to be funny,” he replied. “Not funny, Dad. Not at all.” Since then, he hasn’t made such comments around me. I hope that moment made him reconsider his words, but given that he’s in his 60s, it’s a deep-seated mindset to change.
While I love my father, it saddens me that his views have limited his experiences. If he truly accepted all people, he would be more open to equality. I’m grateful my son witnessed me standing up for what’s right. He saw me reject my father’s excuse and advocate for a better future for all of us.
We have the power to initiate change. It’s time to break the cycle, starting now. If you’re interested in learning more about home insemination, check out this helpful guide from Make a Mom or delve into the IVF process with this excellent resource from Parents. For additional insights, you can visit another post at Intracervical Insemination.
Conclusion
In summary, confronting ingrained prejudices is crucial for forging a more inclusive future. It’s our responsibility to guide the next generation toward understanding and acceptance.