If you were to ask my children how they envision Christmas morning, their answer would be simple: “Stay home all day in our pajamas and play with our new toys.” It truly is that straightforward, and for the past few years, we’ve embraced this sentiment without any regrets.
In the past, however, our Christmases were spent in Maine, surrounded by extended family. It was a cherished tradition that provided a lovely escape from our bustling city life, ensuring a picturesque white Christmas, thanks to the constant snowfall starting in October. Our hosts adorned their home beautifully for the season, and we enjoyed their warmth and hospitality.
But when my first child was born a decade ago, that joyful family tradition quickly spiraled into chaos. Our little one was a car screamer, transforming what used to be a four-hour drive into a grueling eight-hour journey filled with constant stops for soothing. Once we arrived, adjusting to a new environment with a baby was no easy feat. His sleep routine was completely thrown off, and he was drawn to every delicate item in their un-babyproofed home. I still recall him munching on pinecones and tinsel at breakfast that year.
We hoped the next year would be better, but after several years of making that trek, it became clear that holiday travel with kids just wasn’t as enjoyable as we had imagined. I often found myself doing more packing and unpacking than actually enjoying our time away. The car screaming may have ceased, but crankiness lingered, especially with the addition of a second child.
As my kids grew older, they began to express a genuine preference for engaging in holiday traditions within the comforts of our own home. And really, who could blame them? Most kids naturally gravitate towards the coziness of familiar surroundings, especially during the holidays. They just want to relax and enjoy the gifts they’ve eagerly anticipated for months.
So, a few years ago, we decided to break from our long-standing Christmas tradition of visiting family in Maine. Let me tell you, that was no easy decision. The way we choose to spend the holidays can be a sensitive subject, often laden with guilt and pressure. Not everyone understands your reasoning, and some may even challenge you on it.
It’s genuinely challenging to break family traditions, particularly during the festive season. However, asserting your own family’s needs is perfectly acceptable. In our earlier years, it felt daunting, but as we’ve matured, it has been easier to establish our boundaries.
I won’t deny that there’s something truly special about celebrating the holidays with extended family, and I do miss it at times. Watching my children bond with their aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandparents is a joy I cherish, and I want them to hold onto those memories.
Yet, there’s an equally enchanting experience in spending the holidays with just your immediate family at home, and that has become our new norm. Honestly? I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
A “just us” holiday means staying up late, munching on popcorn, and watching classics like A Charlie Brown Christmas and Miracle on 34th Street until the kids drift off in your arms. It means waking up on Christmas morning, indulging in leftover cookies for breakfast, and basking in the freedom of having nowhere to go, no obligations, and no one to impress.
It’s about baking together in our pajamas without the stress of messing up someone else’s kitchen. It means not having to juggle multiple personalities and their differing opinions on holiday traditions. Instead of being stressed, we get to savor every moment of our time off work, enjoying lazy days with family.
And yes, sometimes it means stepping away from established traditions, possibly upsetting a few people along the way. But it also allows us to create our own traditions, ones that will stick with us and our children for years to come.
So, if you find yourself overwhelmed by family obligations during the holiday season and feel that a cozy, home-based celebration with your immediate family is what you truly desire, go for it. Cut the ties. Embrace your own way of celebrating. I assure you, it will be just as magical as you have envisioned.
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In summary, choosing how to celebrate the holidays should be based on what makes you and your family happiest. There’s beauty in creating your unique traditions, and it’s perfectly fine to prioritize what feels right for your immediate family.