Congratulations on welcoming your new little one into the world! While you’ll hear plenty of well-meaning advice, there are some truths about motherhood that often go unspoken. Get ready to dive into the unexpected realities of parenting that no one really prepares you for.
Your little angel may not be as cute as you think.
You might envision your baby emerging like a cherubic model from a baby food ad, but the truth is your newborn will likely resemble a squished potato with wobbly limbs. Sure, in your eyes, they’ll be perfect, thanks to those magical mommy hormones, but don’t be shocked when others gently lie and call your little one “unique.”
Everyone’s advice is really about them.
From breastfeeding to sleep training, you’ll find that most of the suggestions people offer serve their own agendas. Whether it’s about co-sleeping, introducing solids, or using essential oils, remember that their opinions are more about them than what’s best for you. It’s okay to nod along politely while you internally roll your eyes.
Master the art of the polite smile.
While in the hospital, practice your best “I appreciate your input” smile, especially when it comes to unsolicited advice from relatives. Agree with everything—whether it’s about consuming your placenta or swaddling techniques—because it’ll make them feel important. Save your true thoughts for later when you can laugh about it with friends.
Get ready for some surprising sounds.
Your tiny bundle will produce sounds that could rival a grown man after a feast. Yes, babies can be quite gassy, and it’s something no one really talks about. Don’t worry; it’s completely normal.
Always have baby wipes on hand.
These little wonders will become your best friends. You’ll use them for everything—from cleaning your baby’s face and bottoms to wiping your own hands and even your car’s interior after a surprise mess. Trust us, you can never have too many wipes.
Baby clothing can be pricey.
Resist the urge to splurge on that trendy outfit. Instead, consider thrifting for baby clothes to save for future siblings. Your child will outgrow them faster than you can say “Polo,” and that money could be better spent on their future.
You might find yourself in a snot-sucking situation.
Despite any initial resistance, you may find yourself using a nasal aspirator when your baby has a stuffy nose. It’s surprising how satisfying it can be to clear those little nostrils, even if you swore you’d never go there.
Swaddling might be trickier than it looks.
You may think you can master swaddling, but it’s a skill that often eludes new parents. Just let someone more experienced take over or invest in those easy-to-use swaddle sacks.
Your baby will want to be held—constantly.
Babies thrive on human contact, and if you try to put them down, prepare for a meltdown. You’ll likely become the primary baby holder, which can make even a quick shower feel like a luxury.
You may experience some unexpected bodily changes.
Your body will go through significant changes post-birth, and you may find yourself leaking milk or experiencing vaginal bleeding. Yoga pants will become your new best friend as you navigate this new phase.
Finding your mom tribe is essential.
Connecting with other moms can feel like navigating a high school cafeteria. Look for those who seem approachable and relaxed; they’re often just as eager to bond.
You didn’t break your baby.
Accidents happen, whether it’s a little fall or mishap. Rest assured that your little one will be just fine. By the time you have your third child, you’ll be more relaxed about these things and can even let the dog babysit for a few minutes while you take a shower.
In short, the journey into motherhood is filled with surprises, mostly involving poop. You’ll spend a lot of time managing diaper blowouts and navigating the world of baby care. It’s a messy, beautiful adventure, and you’re in for quite the ride.
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Summary: Becoming a new mom is full of surprises, challenges, and laughter. From the realities of diaper changes to navigating unsolicited advice, embracing the chaos is all part of the journey. Remember, you’re not alone in this, and it’s okay to seek advice from trusted sources.