Please Stop Criticizing Millennial Parents — We’re Trying Our Best

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While browsing my Facebook feed the other day, I stumbled upon a viral post that caught the attention of many of my friends. The image featured a distinguished older gentleman in a sharp suit, grinning smugly under the title, “Expert Claims Parents — ‘You’re Doing It All Wrong.’”

This scenario is all too familiar. It’s not always an expert; sometimes it’s a psychologist, a seasoned professional, or a parent from the baby boomer generation. Yet, the core message remains unchanged: Millennial parents are failing at the task. As a millennial parent, I can’t help but feel overwhelmed by the constant barrage of articles and memes telling me how I’m messing it up. Seriously, if I see one more, I might just lose my mind.

There are certainly many ways to parent incorrectly. If you sneak out for happy hour while your child naps, that’s questionable. Putting a diaper on a baby’s head instead of their bottom? Definitely wrong. Letting them sip hot coffee before they’re potty trained? Absolutely not. These are clear-cut mistakes that anyone would recognize. However, most critiques of our parenting choices aren’t about these obvious blunders.

The real focus is on our approach: how we communicate with our kids, how we discipline, and what we feed them. We’re criticized for being too lenient one moment and then too strict the next. It seems there’s no winning — whatever path we choose is often labeled as incorrect.

Millennial parents face countless challenges: stagnant wages, lack of parental leave, student debt, and a desperate need for sleep. Yet, we are inundated with information. Boomers often roll their eyes at us glued to our phones, but that’s likely because a millennial mom is reading the latest research and anxiously questioning her choices — like whether she should’ve taken fish oil during pregnancy to prevent asthma in her child.

With an abundance of parenting books and daily updates on new studies and product recalls, we have more information than we could ever process. We can even face judgment from other parents online without stepping outside our homes. While having access to so much information can empower us to make informed choices, it can also feel suffocating.

I’d much rather spend my fleeting free moments listening to a cartoon than hearing about how I’m supposedly ruining my kid’s life.

That said, I do value the wisdom of those who’ve been around longer than I have. Parents with adult children often possess insights that can be enlightening. I’m aware that we might be making choices that will make us cringe in the future, just as many boomers look back at outdated car seats or lawn darts with disbelief. It’s truly a wonder that we’ve all survived to have these discussions.

If you think we’re getting it all wrong, that’s fine. Just let us navigate this parenting journey the best we can. Most of the time, we’re just winging it. We love our kids deeply and are striving to provide them with fulfilling lives. So, please, have a little faith in our abilities. Or if that’s too much to ask, perhaps just close your eyes and wish us well like you did when Uncle Joe launched a lawn dart.

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Summary

In a world filled with parenting critiques, millennial parents are often told they’re doing it all wrong. While clear mistakes exist, much of the criticism revolves around subjective choices in parenting style. Millennial parents juggle numerous challenges but have access to a wealth of information. It’s essential to foster understanding and support rather than judgment.