I can sense your disapproval. As you engage with our little one after dinner, I notice your expression when I chuckle or smile at my phone. I hear your quiet sighs when I’m multitasking, bathing the baby while scrolling through messages or relaxing with our oldest while typing away. I recognize that I might be a bit too attached to my phone, but there’s more to my reliance on this little device than you realize.
Yes, I admit it: I have a phone addiction. We’ve gone over articles together on how detrimental this can be for us individually and as a couple, and I know it sets a poor example for our kids. We made promises to reduce screen time in the past, but somehow, we seem to be more engrossed than before. While I’m making an effort to limit my phone use around the children, my day-to-day as a stay-at-home mom looks quite different. Conversations with adults are rare; my days are filled with a rambunctious toddler, a fussy baby, and our playful dog.
Do you remember when our weekends were all about hanging out with friends? I used to have a bustling social life filled with slumber parties and camp adventures. Now, after moving away and starting a family, my social circle has dwindled significantly. I often find myself chatting with friends through social media and text messages instead of meeting in person.
You might not fully grasp how extroverted I am. I thrive on the energy of others, especially adults. Too much time alone, even when surrounded by the kids, leaves me feeling isolated and restless. I often find myself looking for excuses to leave the house, even if it just means chatting with a cashier at the store. I’m on a first-name basis with several employees at Target; even a brief conversation can brighten my day.
When I became a mom 11 years ago, online support groups became my lifeline. Even now, with three children, these connections are invaluable. They provide me with essential advice, whether I’m wondering about breastfeeding or seeking reassurance about a concerning rash on our toddler. They are also the ones I turn to when I’ve had a tough day and need to vent—these women truly understand my journey.
It’s not that I want to disengage from our family life; it’s just that being at home often makes me crave more social interaction. I feel isolated, and getting out of the house with all three kids is a monumental task that often feels overwhelming. Sometimes, it’s just easier to sit with a cold cup of coffee, feeding the baby while still in my pajamas. I wish I could reclaim that sense of normalcy, but it can be exhausting to try.
When you see my eyes glued to my phone, know that I’m usually seeking advice or sharing laughs with a friend over something we both found amusing online. My support network may be virtual, but it has its perks, too. I understand your frustrations with my phone habits; I hear your concerns and acknowledge them. What you may not realize is how much these connections mean to me and how difficult it has been to adapt to my new role as a mother. I often feel inadequate, and hearing affirmations from my virtual village is incredibly uplifting.
I don’t expect you to completely understand my perspective, but please know that I’m making an effort. I hope that with each passing day and milestone, I can reclaim a bit of myself. I know you miss the person I used to be, and trust me, I do too. Until then, my coffee may be cold, my patience may be thin, and my social life is confined to the tiny screen in my pocket.
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To summarize, my phone usage is driven by my need for social interaction and support, which is often lacking in my day-to-day life as a stay-at-home mom. While I’m aware of the downsides, these connections help me cope and feel less isolated. I’m actively trying to balance my phone use with being present for our family, hoping that I can gradually find my way back to the person I used to be.