Today, my partner and I enjoyed a delightful daytime outing, which is like a nighttime rendezvous, but with fewer cocktails and no need for babysitters. Well, I did indulge in a Mexican Mule at lunch, so let’s just say there was definitely some alcohol involved. The menu featured artisanal cocktails, and I felt a surge of support for those dedicated to the craft of mixology. Given my intentional choice to enjoy a drink, I’m all for celebrating my decision—no judgment here, just cheers! After all, anything with “Mexican” in the name is bound to be delicious… unless it isn’t, and then we might be in for disaster.
We chose this day date because we recognize the need for change. Life had begun to revolve around work commitments, travel, our kids’ schedules, and the endless cycle of chores—like spending $300 at the vet for a plastic cone for our dog. It often felt like we were merely ticking boxes instead of truly enjoying life. Continuing down this path might make it difficult to remember what drew us to each other in the first place—or even what we love about ourselves and our adorably clumsy dog. Thankfully, we’ve decided that this routine can’t go on.
With our youngest starting kindergarten this year and our oldest becoming increasingly independent, we are navigating a new phase in our lives. This transition is both thrilling and a bit of a relief. Now that everyone can manage bathroom trips and snacks without assistance, I’m free from my role as the Healthy Snack Enforcer. However, this shift has also highlighted some cracks in our relationship, prompting us to reflect on our individual identities beyond parenting.
As we emerge from the haze of sleepless nights and toddler chaos, we’re realizing that we’re not just parents; we’re individuals with our own tastes, beliefs, and quirks. It’s a little daunting to figure out what we want to become in this new stage of life, but we must remember to support each other through it all. And I genuinely appreciate that.
We’re making some small yet meaningful changes. We’re setting aside quality time for one another and asking each other about topics that go beyond carpool logistics or our kids’ favorite shows. It felt liberating to laugh and escape the weight of daily responsibilities. Sometimes, amidst the chaos of everyday life, we forget the importance of stepping out and simply having fun.
One day, our kids will be off to college, probably excelling in their studies and making us proud. But when that time comes, I want my partner and I to have a strong relationship that continues to grow as our children do. As much as I love having them around, I know we’ll want to nurture our connection as they venture into the world.
Honestly, I need my partner. No one else instantly rolls down the car window after someone sneezes, reminding me of that amusing 7th-grade science video on sneezing that’s forever etched in my mind. He’s also the one who brews a perfect cup of French press coffee in the morning—something I can only dream of while I struggle with my Keurig.
Sure, he whistles at the crack of dawn, which can be a bit annoying, but he also brings me coffee in bed. Plus, he’s taught our kids to whistle too, which will serve them better than my morning routine of mourning the end of sleep.
I share these thoughts because I know many of us face similar struggles. Social media often distorts our perception of reality, showcasing only the highlight reels of others’ lives. I’m not posting pictures of my kids turning their noses up at dinner again or the chaos of my husband rolling his eyes in frustration. We all have our challenges, and it’s essential to remember that everyone has their own mess to navigate.
Marriage is a work in progress, and I can’t neatly wrap it up in a bow. As you tackle your own life today, know that I’m in the trenches too—it’s not all perfectly curated moments on social media. Sometimes it’s just the reality of life, like when our dog looks like he just emerged from a plastic cone universe.
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Summary
Day dates with my partner are essential as we navigate the transitions of parenthood. They provide a refreshing break from our daily routines, allowing us to reconnect and appreciate each other as individuals. As our children grow, it’s important to nurture our relationship to ensure it thrives alongside them.