This Valentine’s Day marks a bittersweet note for me. My husband, Jake, of 14 years reached out for the first time on this special day, but I was too busy enjoying steak and lemon cookies with my two single sisters at my mom’s house to answer.
When I returned home, I found a voicemail from him. His voice sounded unfamiliar, like someone I had just met once, yet it was nice to know he was thinking of me. I glanced at the clock—it was still early enough for a late-night call. Without hesitation, I dialed him up.
Our conversation flowed for hours, leading to plans for a night out with friends two days later, and I barely slept with excitement. Although we didn’t officially date on Valentine’s Day, we always celebrated it as our anniversary during our courtship. It felt more romantic than a date two days later.
From that moment, everything blossomed—three dates in, we decided to be exclusive, and love unfolded quickly. Jake met my entire family that Easter, and we spent every weekend together for two years before he moved in. We shared countless adventures from canoeing to fancy dinners and camping trips. After three years together, we got engaged, bought a home, and married the following year. Soon after, our lives were filled with the joys of parenthood.
Now, 17 years later, we find ourselves on the edge of divorce, questioning if we still have anything left to hold onto. Valentine’s Day has always been meaningful for us, yet over time, our celebrations faded into simple dinners and early bedtimes for the kids. This year, we will both be alone, but I refuse to let sadness consume me.
Instead of mourning the day of love, I choose to embrace its spirit. Valentine’s Day reminds me of sweet candy hearts and the hours I spent crafting cards for classmates in elementary school. My mom made the day special for us kids even through her divorce, with candlelit dinners and thoughtful gifts wrapped in red paper.
I cherish the memories of when Jake first called me, signaling the start of something beautiful. As I drove home from a delightful evening with my sisters, I felt content in my own skin. I have so much to be grateful for, and I recognize that this year, self-love needs to be a priority.
I won’t wallow in despair or engage in dramatic gestures. Instead, I plan to enjoy the day with my kids, savoring Chinese food and giving them little candy treats wrapped in red tissue paper. I’ll even treat myself to flowers and chocolates because I deserve it—why wait for someone else to make me feel special?
I refuse to be sad this Valentine’s Day, even as my marriage crumbles. There is an abundance of love in the world, especially the love we give ourselves, and that is what I need to celebrate this year.
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Summary:
Laura reflects on her marriage’s challenges while choosing to embrace the joy of Valentine’s Day despite her situation. She celebrates the memories of love and self-care over despair, planning to create a special day with her children while prioritizing her own happiness.